ETHICS FOR SUCCESS

Wisdom and Understanding--Keys to Success

2011-02-26T10:09:00.005-07:00

As we began exploring the natural laws from the Book of Proverbs in my last blog, our focus was on the basic ingredients for success, knowledge and wisdom. Knowledge is a system of truth and wisdom is the application of that truth. In Proverbs, chapter 2, verses 10 and 11 we read:

Vs.10 When wisdom enters your heart, And knowledge is pleasant to your soul, Vs.11 Discretion will preserve you; Understanding will keep you.

As we apply knowledge, we get wisdom. Interestingly, wisdom is not always sunshine and roses. We get wisdom when we do the right thing, and the wrong! Wisdom is learning from our mistakes and not doing the same wrong thing over and over. Wisdom should produce discretion, i.e., the common sense not to do the wrong thing again. When we naturally are able to do the right thing consistently, we have achieved understanding in our hearts that will promote good results in our lives.

Notice we're talking about our hearts, not our minds. One of Webster's definitions of heart is:

"The human heart considered as the center or source of emotions, personality attributes; specifically inmost thoughts and feelings, consciousness or conscience, the source of emotions, the source of intellect, one's emotional nature or disposition, any of various human feelings such as love, devotion or sympathy, mood, spirit, resolution, courage, etc."

Actually, the heart is all that man or woman is! It is the reservoir of who we are. So a key to life success is allowing wisdom to work its way into our hearts. When wisdom controls, we succeed. When our natural inclinations and actions control, we usually don't win!

I remember a story told by a veteran pastor. After 20 plus years in the pulpit, his wife called his office to tell him the natural grandparents of his adopted children has just forcefully taken their children from their home. Knowing where the grandparents lived, the pastor jumped in his car and drove to a local pawn shop, bought two large caliber hand guns and all the ammunition he could carry. He then sped toward the grandparent's home with every intention of shooting everything above 5 feet tall in the house! Fortunately, he was stopped by a friend who was a highway patrolman and was not able to carry out the things in his heart. When he shared this story, he concluded with a lesson for us all: The heart of man and woman is deceitfully wicked and none of us know what we are capable of in times of trouble!

As we begin exploring these natural laws for success, it is a good time for honesty with ourselves. What is in our hearts that may be standing in the way of our success in marriage, business or life? It may be time to ask for help to get understanding! If you have questions or comments, post them to this blog and indicate if you prefer not to have them published. If you'd like to participate in this journey with me, be sure to sign up as a follower to receive notice of each of my posts. I pray you will be filled with wisdom and understanding!

Are There Laws for Success? Join Me and See!

2011-02-13T08:49:00.006-07:00

I'm sure if you watch the Saturday infomercials your answer to this question would be yes. At least the merchandisers of success would like us to believe they have the secrets to success!

The truth is laws for success were established in the earth thousands of years ago. These laws for success parallel natural and scientific laws that operate on the earth such as gravity, seasons for planting and harvesting and even thermodynamics just to name a few. One does not have to believe in these natural laws for them to work. They just do!

The natural laws for success are documented in the Book of Proverbs in the Old Testament of the Holy Bible. People of many faiths, and some with no faith at all, have obeyed these laws and found success in many areas of their lives.
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These natural laws for success are the foundation of all ethics, in our personal lives and in our work. During 2011, we'll explore these laws and their applications.

To begin, here are the purposes of the Book of Proverbs in chapter one, verses two through five:

Vs. 2: To know wisdom and instruction, To perceive the words of understanding, Vs. 3: To receive the instruction of wisdom, Justice, judgment, and equity; Vs. 4: To give prudence to the simple, To the young man knowledge and discretion-- Vs. 5: A wise man will hear and increase learning, And a man of understanding will attain wise counsel, .....

Two of the key ingredients mentioned here are knowledge and wisdom. In reality, one is not the other! Knowledge is a system of truth and wisdom is the application of the system. Join me over the next few months as we explore these natural laws for success!

Are You Ready?

2010-10-10T08:25:00.003-06:00

Watching a few minutes of television commercials during this election season quickly illustrates the state of our nation. While the economic condition of the United States is in great jeopardy, it is not the most important issue before us. The moral depravity of our leadership is the most important issue.

Political ads fill most available advertising spots on television and radio. Newspaper, magazine and internet advertising is dominated by politicians being responsible for this or that. Unfortunately, the only thing they are not responsible for it their ethical behavior!

These media ads are filled with half-truths, sound bites taken out of context, innuendos and out right lies! All this to gain our favor! Even when one is caught in a blatant lie, the spin is "I'm sorry I misspoke on several occasions. I didn't mean to say ________ and it has nothing to do with my character or ability to carry out my responsibilities." Somehow the word "misspoke" has become the acceptable way to say "I lied!"

Political agendas can no longer be evaluated based on what a politician says. Actually, the opposite has become true. What they don't say is more likely the truth!

So, where does this leave you and I? When people are calling evil good and good evil, how are we to know who to believe? Only one way is possible and it's not our belief system, our experiences or our preferences. It is God's standards and guidelines presented in the Holy Bible.

This continual best-selling Book contains the only time-enduring truth. It is the operation manual for mankind. Not a Word has ever been proven wrong! Supported by the works of historians, archeologists and even skeptics, it is the inspired Word of God.

Any behavior or speech that does not line up with the Word of God is based on a lie, no matter whether it is from a politician, minister, business leader or from you or me! It is only when we read, study and meditate on Biblical Scriptures that we can know the truth.

Only by knowing the Truth can we truly be free to live our lives ethically, morally and be an example for others to follow. We don't have to be perfect, no one is. We simply have to know God and His plan for our lives. That plan was demonstrated by His Son, Jesus Christ. There is no other Way!

Spiritual darkness is covering the earth. The Bible tells us the Light in us will push back and even change the darkness around us. Christ in us is the Light and our Hope of Glory, even in the midst of the depravity of these times. In the Old Testament of the Bible we can read about how God sheltered His people during the plagues of Egypt. He has promised to do so again for people that believe and trust His Son, Jesus Christ.

So I ask again, are you ready?

Who Do You Trust?

2010-09-11T09:13:00.005-06:00

As chaos erupts around the world, as the economy teeters on the brink of collapse, as politicians try to win favor with only their words, and as spiritual darkness permeates every sector of society, who can be trusted? How can we know who is deserving of our trust? We'll briefly explore these issues in this blog.

Webster's New World Dictionary defines trust:

"Firm belief or confidence in the honesty, integrity, reliability, justice, etc. of another person or thing; faith; reliance."

A starting point for this discussion would be to ask is a person "trustworthy." Applying Webster's definition would indicate that persons are trustworthy when they are honest, have integrity and are reliable. Most of us would agree this means that a person will tell the truth, not just most of the time but all the time. It would mean the person demonstrates integrity by what they say and do. It would mean one could rely on what a person says because they say what they mean and mean what they say! To shorten the thought, we can know whether a person is trustworthy by the demonstration of their character.

If one purchases a bottle of water that is certified to be 99.44% spring water and .56% sewage, would it be considered drinkable? Certainly not! Yet our evaluation of the character of politicians, business leaders and even church leaders doesn't seem to be affected if they "spin" the truth, if what they do is primarily for the purpose of enriching or aggrandizing themselves or if it is primarily for the purpose of accomplishing their political or personal agenda.

One might question at this point whether anyone can be considered trustworthy. No human being is perfect and most of us realize that perfection is not a mark of character. Character emanates from within, i.e., whatever is in our heart. Our personal experiences, desires, motives and beliefs shape our character. Our character usually changes throughout life, for better or for worse!

The Holy Bible, in Proverbs 4:23 and 4:24, says:

"Keep (guard) your heart with all diligence, for out of it spring the issues of life. Put away from you a deceitful mouth, and put perverse lips far from you."

I could interpret this verse as, "Keep honesty, integrity and good character in your heart. Don't deviate from these things, no matter what the cost. Don't speak false, deceitful words or half-truths because they will fill your heart and diminish your character."

1 Timothy 4:1 and 4:2 supports these truths. "Now the Spirit expressly says that in latter times some will depart from the faith, giving heed to deceiving spirits and doctrines of demons, speaking lies in hypocrisy, having their own conscience seared with a hot iron..."

So, here's the bottom line. The character of man is demonstrated by what he/she does and says. Trust can be earned in this way or the true nature of a person can be revealed. The character of a person should tell us if they are trustworthy. Only a fool would place trust in a person that is not trustworthy! Who do you trust?

From Unethical to Evil to Death--the State of our Nation

2010-08-06T05:16:00.003-06:00

I've resisted being direct in my previous blogs about the state of our nation. What is happening now is the fruit of decades of leadership that has managed our government by the politicians for the politicians. The corruption of power has divided this nation and prepared it for an imminent fall. It is time for you and I to be heard. Darkness is covering our nation. It's leadership has embarked on a path of destruction.

Ethics have been replaced by every man (party!) doing what it thinks right in its own eyes. The party line has become the gospel. Lies have been told so long they are accepted as the truth. Good has become evil and evil has become good.

I'm reminded of the people and leadership in Germany before World War II. A significant majority of the people knew nothing of the anti-Semitic plans and activities of the government. Their leader was charismatic, non-traditional and a powerful orator. Like the frog in a pan of water on the stove, the people of Germany didn't even notice the temperature rising until the water was boiling...and then it was too late! Government cannot be our god!

Behavior that is unethical has become acceptable. More than that, it has become the norm! Leading up to mid-term elections, the primary campaigning should be enough to wake us up! Saying what appears to be most expedient in disparaging a competitor is the least of the unethical practices. Blatant lies, half truths and innuendos in advertisements have sunk to the lowest level of depravity. But, never mind, this is the way we do it. The water gets hotter!

We are being governed by a president, a speaker of the house and a leader of the senate that disdains, if not hates, our nation. Disregard for the will of the people and the basic economics of government, and focusing entirely on achieving political and personal agendas, has set the stage for collapse. It is obvious to most of us that we can't run our businesses or our personal finances by continually spending many times what we earn simply by borrowing more money. Disaster awaits! Current leadership is perfecting the plan of decades that is leading to the destruction of our nation!

I'm not an alarmist but I am a contrarian (thinking contrary to the majority). My profession is auditing and I was trained to look beyond the surface of things. We call it professional skepticism. This is how auditors identify frauds! When the column of numbers don't add up, there is something wrong. Our nation's numbers don't add up! We can't print enough money, borrow enough money or increase taxes enough to pay the interest on the ballooning national debt, let alone its principal. Eat, drink and be merry for tomorrow we die?

A perfect storm has begun! We must awake from our sleep and begin talking about the evil of our nation's leaders that is perpetrating fraud on the American people! In our circles of influences, we must speak and demonstrate our abhorrence of the evil that is overshadowing us. Most of all, we must pray!

2 Chronicles 7:14: "If My people who are called by My Name will humble themselves, and pray and seek My face, and turn from their wicked ways, then I will hear from heaven, and will forgive their sin and heal their land."

Please send a link to this blog to everyone on your contact list. It's time our voices are heard!

The New National Pastime--Blame Shifting!

2010-07-24T13:04:00.006-06:00

If you don't believe the headliner, just watch a watch a news show, read a newspaper or surf the Internet. President Obama blames republicans for slowing up the recovery. Today, Vice-President Biden blamed the Bush administration again for the economic mess in our nation. Press Secretary Gibbs and the current administration blames FOX News for presenting unbalanced reports. State politicians competing in the primary each blame the others for taking money from big oil, banks and others. In an interview on NBC, Matt Laur questioned who to blame for the false accusation of racism against an agriculture department employee. A news reporter on HLN today posted a storyline, "Who is to blame for childhood obesity." A man who smoked too much and got cancer, sued the tobacco company for making cigarettes...and won! On and on, ad nauseum!

When we are accused of wrong, many of our first thoughts are often about blaming someone else. Why do we shift the blame? The answer is simple. We want others to be accountable so we don't have to be! When we blame others, we believe our shortcomings are less likely to be exposed. We don't have to change our behavior when others are made suspect. We can accomplish our agenda easier when we tear down others' agendas. It's easy to criticize and blame. It's hard to take responsibility. We think blame shifting can help us get ahead; instead it actually reveals one's cowardice and fear. Blame-shifting is the trademark for a victim mentality and the behavior of a weakling!

On the other hand, a good leader is accountable for his/her actions and takes responsibility for his/her own mistakes. The career of a leader is not built on blame but on accomplishment. The actions of a leader are not based on deception but on high integrity and good ethical behavior. Success for a leader is not based on pre-designed, empty words but on honesty, hard work, encouragement of others and sacrifices. A good leader has committed followers of like kind, not shallow, self-centered, blame-shifting weaklings.

Governments, businesses and individuals that build at the expense of others create glass houses. What we sow, we reap many times over. What do you want from life? Isn't it time for a new ball-game?

The Death of the Human Trust Factor

2010-07-09T15:17:00.005-06:00

Have you heard the old saying, "he spits whichever way the wind is blowing?" Well, maybe you didn't hear those exact words but got the meaning anyway. A person can't be trusted because he/she changes their opinions or beliefs whenever it benefits them personally. There is no trust factor with such a double-minded person.

Webster says trust is a "firm belief or confidence in the honesty, integrity, reliability, justice, etc., of another person or thing." So, who can we trust? A political administration such as the one we have today? Big business and Wall Street? The media? Movie stars? Sports heroes? I'm sad to say, I can't name one person from these arenas I could trust.

Situational ethics and relativism has brought our nation into gross darkness. Good is being called evil and evil good! Leadership is devious and crafty, out for its own. Most of society follows. Speak the truth to the contrary and be ostracized. In the death of the human trust factor, can there be hope?

Isaiah 60:2 has the answer: "For behold, the darkness shall cover the earth, and deep darkness the people; but the Lord will arise over you, and His glory will be seen upon you." Human trust factors will die but the Lord Jesus Christ is the same forever! He will never violate our trust. Christ in us is the hope of glory, even in the midst of the darkness of this age. We can have His kind of life; all we have to do is ask!

What Are Your Words Worth?

2010-06-27T08:42:00.007-06:00

We make vows when we marry. Politicians take oaths of office. We swear to tell the truth when giving testimony. We make commitments and promises with our words. What are your words worth?

In our society, words seem only important in the circumstances in which they are uttered. Whether it's big business or big government, most words are disingenuous. Many are intended to deceive and mislead. Most are for the purpose of promoting the agendas of the utterer.

In considering membership in a church recently, I was asked to sign a "covenant" of words with the leadership that was basically a commitment to submission. While presented as protection for members, this was a thinly veiled attempt to control behavior of a congregation, all in the name of what's right. Words that may appear appropriate, often aren't!

Our president and his administration use words to promote their agendas, which often are not so carefully veiled! Words, however, can deflect attention and criticism and make it seem appropriate actions are being taken when they really aren't. Words can be used for good and for evil, by anyone!

So, the question is, "How do we judge the veracity of words, others and ours? There is only one absolute standard, God's Word in the Holy Bible. A book that many have tried to destroy, that many don't believe, contains the only standard for truth. Stories of individuals setting out to disprove the contents of the Bible abound. Most have ended up believing because true words have power!

God spoke the world and mankind into existence by His Word! He sent His Son, Jesus, to die for our sins so we could be connected with Him, with His love and power. When we confess Jesus as Lord with our words, and believe in our heart He died to make us righteous, we become part of God's family. Now we can speak words of truth that have power. We can pray words that will change our lives and the lives of others. In Jesus Christ, our words will echo into eternity! They have worth far beyond our understanding! What are your words worth?

Have We Become a Nation of Accusers?

2010-06-05T06:07:00.003-06:00

Most of us would quickly answer this question "yes." Whether it is big business, big government, big politics, big media or just big egos, it seems the way to the top in any endeavor is through accusation. Even an answer to this question sounds like an accusation!

To accuse, Webster says, is to find fault or blame, or to bring charges against for doing wrong. Obviously, without accusation there could be no system of jurisprudence. When laws are broken, accusations are in order! Beyond the law, what determines an appropriate accusation (if there is such a thing!)?

Back to our definition, accusation is based on wrong doing. Wrong doing in politics has become any thought or action contrary to a party line. In our personal lives, it is often the belief systems of others that differ from ours. The real question is, do these circumstances justify finding fault, blaming or charging others with wrong.

When a law is broken, a person adjudicates the violation; this person is called a judge. Our constitution established the judicial branch to interpret laws. What happens when there is no appointed judge?

When there is no appointed judge, every man does what is right in his own eyes. We become the accuser and the judge!

In America, much of public life is built on the principle of accusation. A way to avoid being accountable for our own shortcomings is to accuse others. Our president, congressional leaders, heads of business and even religious leaders have become masters of this principle to little beneficial end.

The Bible says we are to encourage one another, to bear the burdens of others and even to love our enemies! Why do you suppose? Could it be that unity brings success, even power over opposition? I struggle to do my part. How about you?

What You Believe Will Come to Pass!

2010-04-17T09:47:00.004-06:00

I remember a story about a woman that didn't go to a dentist for most of her life because she feared she'd die in the chair. When most of her teeth had decayed and fallen out she couldn't stand the pain, she went for help. She died in the chair!

Another woman grew up with an abusive, alcoholic father. She vowed she would never marry a man like her father. After three marriages to non-alcoholic men, each became alcoholic and treated her like her father did. Counseling later revealed that, in her heart, she believed all men were like her father.

Good or bad, what we believe in our hearts drive our thoughts and actions. Believe a lie and it becomes our truth! Believe the truth and it becomes reality.

Even most physicists recognize this phenomenon. Quantum physics principles hold that we all are a part of a whole. What we believe and do affects ourselves and the universe. A basic principle of the Bible is faith. What you believe is what you get!

If this is true, then we have a choice. If I can believe what God says about me rather than what my bad experiences have taught me, I can succeed in any thing I do. I can succeed in life! What do you believe?

The Making of a Warrior

2010-04-17T07:23:00.002-06:00

Jim Chosa, a Crow Indian by marriage, has written a chronology on how the Crow Tribe grooms male children to become warriors. Here is what I remember.

The story begins with a 5 year old boy sleeping with his parents in a tent one cold, snowy morning. The boy awakes as someone grabs his ankle and begins to drag him through the snow towards the river. The boy next feels his body catapulting through the air, landing in the river and the beginning of his battle for survival!

Training their young boys to be warriors meant survival for a Crow family and their tribe. The family hired the best warrior they could find as a mentor for their son. The boy was taught skills for survival, for battle and for living a humble, others-centered life.

Around the age of 13, he was sent into the wilderness with no food, no clothes and no weapons on his "quest." Instructed to lay face down in a clearing, he could not move until he received his "vision" from the Great Spirit. Even when approached by a bear or mountain lion, he was forbidden to move but, instead, to trust a power higher than himself. Only after successfully completing this experience could the young warrior begin to pursue his calling.

When he was ready, he was permitted to accompany his mentor into battle. Only when he had proven his abilities, and when he had learned to delight in his purpose, was he permitted to enter the battle alone.

When he was victorious in his first hand-to-hand conflict, a coup they called it, he was awarded a feather for his head band. Surrounded by family and friends, he learned how to share his victory humbly and to appreciate those that "stayed with the stuff!"

The Crow don't train warriors any more and some of their men will tell you they've lost their purpose. Each of us has been created for a unique purpose. Like the Crow warrior, our life experiences have been our training. I'll be 68 soon and finally began to realize my life purpose! I'm delighting in it! It's never too late.

How about you? Have you found your purpose? There is a warrior inside of you!

Becoming Who We Are

2010-04-10T11:42:00.005-06:00

Like most of us, my personal goal in life has been to be better when I finish than when I started. I've told my seminar participants many times that instead of a detailed life plan, my desire is just to keep my learning curve up. Actually, I want to keep obtaining knowledge that can be applied to business and life circumstances. Through this process my hope is that I continue to grow in wisdom and character.

As noble as this may sound, without understanding of who and what I am it is doubtful I will end up where I'm supposed to be. It's a little like driving my car as I get older; taking my eyes off the road for just a few seconds can quickly take me where I'm looking! Each of us has a special destiny that can only be obtained if we know where we are going. Understanding who we are is a key to getting to where we are going!

Who am I? Here is my brief synopsis. I have a body, a soul (a mind, will and emotions) and a spirit (a conscience and intuition). My mind has a brain which translates thoughts into action through my body. My soul accumulates life experiences which produces thoughts patterned after those experiences. My spirit checks the behavior of my soul when my thoughts and actions are not good by making me feel guilty. The combination of my soul and spirit becomes my heart, or my center from which all thought, emotions, behavior and actions emanate. I've got all this equipment so I must have purpose! I mean, I'm already something so what am I to become?

Many of us are continually trying to change because we don't like who we are. Sometimes we don't even like other people when they are like we are! If we are trying to change ourselves, it begs the question, "Who are we supposed to be?"

We often work so hard trying to find what we are to do that we sometimes don't get around to finding out who we are supposed to be or to become. I worked 60-70 hours a week for most of my career trying to become something, to find my way to the top of the pile so to speak. It only got me tired! Only when I stopped trying to do did I begin to be!

Careful! I'm not advocating taking up space on a park bench for years to explore the mysteries of the universe in our minds. I'm simply saying that when we spend our daily lives operating at warp speed, we can miss the signposts leading us to who we are to become. It's been said that we were created as human beings, not human doings!

So, how can we find our way to who we should become? For me, it is an ongoing process of separating myself from the thinking and reasoning that continually goes on in my mind, at least for brief periods of time. A life pattern for me, my mind rarely can be turned off. I'm constantly planning, mulling over past events or thinking about what I'm going to do. As most will agree, our business and personal lives must include a certain amount of these activities. The problem surfaces, however, when we are consumed and controlled by the activities of our minds. Our minds often control us instead of us using our minds to accomplish our purposes!

As I shared in the opening paragraph, scientists, theologians, and most religious doctrines agree that we are three part beings. We have a body, a soul and an inner being. Our bodies and souls are connected to the world around us; our inner being is connected to something else (for me it's God). If I've learned anything by living, it's that lasting change must begin on the inside. I can make changes in my behavior and actions in my mind but life's pressures often destroy my good intentions. One person shared, "We're like a tube of toothpaste. When we're squeezed, what's on the inside comes out!"

Here's what some of us have learned: we are helpless to change the things in our hearts. We can make changes in our behavior, but it is rare for those changes to last for a lifetime. Whether it's getting angry at an incompetent store clerk, impatient with a client, irritated at a family member or worse things, I sometimes don't do a good job of controlling my reactions. I want to be free of the offense that rises up in me to react rationally and in a way that will benefit others. Controlling my reactions caused by hurts and wounds deep in my heart is impossible for me. The good news is that it's not impossible for God! What do you think?

Got Respect?

2010-04-03T09:53:00.003-06:00

I remember a sound bite from a Rodney Dangerfield monologue that went something like, "I ain't got no respect." Most of us desire respect and recognition from others. Often in our society, we're looking for recognition for what we do. Not many will admit this but our achievements are often more for our own benefit than they are for the benefit of those we serve, like our employers, clients, family and friends. Wanting to achieve isn't wrong, but there is more to the story.

When I started my career, my objective was to be the best at what I did. Throughout the years, I always worked to be number one although I failed many times. I wanted to be recognized for what I achieved. Although I didn't realize it at the time, my desire to achieve came from a source of low self-esteem and deep feelings of inadequacy. Achievement was for my benefit, mine alone.

Only in my later years did I realize that real achievement comes from serving others well. When we lay aside our human needs for recognition and respect and focus on serving others in our work and personal lives, we get respect for who we are, not just what we do.

I've often observed the crew of the garbage truck that serves our home. When temperatures are freezing, they ride on the back of that truck and eagerly pick up my trash. In sweltering heat, they carefully pick up each piece of garbage that accidentally falls to the ground. If I forget to put the garbage out, they cheerfully ring my doorbell and remind me. I have great respect for who these men are!

Now it's time for some introspection. Here are some questions that are key to getting respect from others. Try to answer these questions as honestly as you can:

1. When other people tell you about what they're doing in their work or personal lives, are you more interested in their circumstances or yours? 2. When your serve others, is your focus more on what you get out of it or on how your service benefits them? 3. In your work, your church projects or chatting with a neighbor over the fence, are you concerned more about them or about you? 4. Do you spend more time thinking about yourself than about others? 5. When visiting with co-workers, family or friends, do you spend more time talking about yourself than you do listening to them? 6. When trying to get others to change bad behavior, do you see things from their point of view or do you throw the book of rules at them? 7. Do you consider yourself better than others?

I don't know about you, but I have a long way to go! If you dare, post a comment and tell readers how you did!

The Good Humor Man

2010-03-27T11:48:00.002-06:00

When I was a kid, the ice cream truck would drive through our neighborhood several time each summer day. The driver was called "The Good Humor Man." I don't ever remember being sad when I gave him my nickel for ice cream on a stick! The Good Humor Man made me smile.

The man in the ice cream truck didn't do much to get me to smile, just drive by and take my nickel. He didn't tell me funny stories, try to get me to laugh or even laugh himself. By his presence and by providing something I liked very much, he brought joy to my life.

Good humor, joy, prevents hardening of the arteries so to speak. Joy brings life to our mind, to our will and to our emotions, especially in hard times.

That ice cream on a stick brought me joy but it disappeared quickly. After a few minutes savoring the ice cream, I had to begin looking for other things to bring me joy, or at least what I thought was joy. A new bike, cap pistols, candy and other things were on my list.

As I grew older I continued to search for things that made me happy. Alcohol, work and fleeting affairs replaced the ice cream on a stick. But like the ice cream, the joy I thought they brought disappeared quickly.

When I was 45, I finally realized there was only one sure source of joy in my life, His name is Jesus Christ. Don't get me wrong, life didn't suddenly turn into a rose garden! Like a small child, I had to learn how to tap into the resources we can have in Him. I'm still learning but I know we can have joy unspeakable that is everlasting! We can have good humor by One Man and it doesn't cost a nickel!

How Do You "Know?"

2010-03-20T07:55:00.004-06:00

In my last blog, I wrote about our propensity to be right, even at the cost of lying and deceiving others. Today we'll drill a little deeper; we'll focus on why some of us can't help ourselves!

The key can be found in the word "perceive." The American Dictionary of the English Language (Webster's 1828 Edition) offers these definitions: "To know; to understand; to observe" and "To have knowledge or receive impressions of external objects through the medium or instrumentality of the senses or bodily organs." The underlying question is how do we "know" something?

Scientific studies have shown our senses filter through our brains. Smells, tastes, sounds often trigger memories of past events in our lives. Our brains store information that, when remembered, can direct the actions of our bodies as well as our emotions. Interestingly, The Heart Math Institute has conducted scientific studies that show our hearts have certain memory capabilities that may be comparable to our brains! In fact, some of their studies have shown the heart is the primary organ controlling our actions and reactions. If we can accept this research, we realize we can "know" in our minds and "know" in our hearts.

So, to the root of the problem. We can easily access our minds for the information stored in our brains. Only a small percentage of mankind can perceive what is in their hearts. The result is we rely mostly on the information stored in our minds to conduct our lives. This information is "what we believe." Unfortunately, we think what we believe in our minds is who we are and it becomes our identity. As human beings, we will defend our identity (our belief systems) at any cost, even lying and deceiving others. When we "have made our minds up" we are no longer open to hearing new information and to sensing our heart reactions.

When we operate out of only what we know in our minds, we are simply "carnal man." Webster defines carnal as being in the natural state, unregenerate, lecherous, lustful and given to sensual indulgence. What we think is right in our minds may not be! The only truth is what we can find in our hearts where we can hear the still, small voice of God. In an old New Jerusalem Translation of the Bible, Proverbs 3:5-8 states it this way: "Trust wholeheartedly in Yahweh, put no faith in your own perception; in every course you take, have him in mind: he will see that your paths are smooth."

Are We Becoming a Nation of Liars and Deceivers?

2010-03-13T07:47:00.004-07:00

I'm fed up with the politics of compromise, deal-making, party agendas, hypocrisy, lies and deception. The art of politics has become never answering "yes" or "no" to a question. Party lines have divided this country and each of us, our children and grandchildren will pay financially, morally and socially...unless our "blinders" are removed.

I think it was Hitler who said, "Tell a lie long enough and the people will believe it as the truth." Sad to say, but the perceptions of many people of this nation has become their truth. Politicians, business leaders, news reporters, ministers, blue collar workers and, yes, even you and me, have made our perceptions our god.

Attending a church that split years ago, I witnessed the offense of the senior pastor produce lies about the circumstances in his later books. He believed his perception to be truth. He has no pulpit now.

I observed the president of a developing company nearly destroy it because he perceived anyone with different perceptions to be his enemy. His life became a lie. His bad life experiences were his truth and he feared that these experiences would be repeated. What he greatly feared has now come upon him and he is about to lose that which he created.

CEOs of investment funds, state attorney generals, senators and members of congress, pastors of large churches, White House press secretaries, presidents, treasury secretaries have lied and deceived the public. For some, there appear to be no consequences on earth; for others there are.

But it's easy to be "the pot calling the kettle black." It's easy for me to defend my perceptions by pointing at the faults of others. The question I have to ask frequently of myself is "What is my reason for offense?" Is it about me or them? My reasons should be more about the future and well-being of others than about my being offended by their behavior. My motives should be to see their lives changed for the better, not my being right.

A few minutes ago, I received a call from someone about an old situation in which I confronted a liar and deceiver. I realized I had given up on the person's behavior ever changing and that I just wanted him punished! Here's the truth: God's ways are not ours! He has made a way for the worst to be made clean through Jesus Christ! After all, He saved a wretch like me!

Why Can't I Do What I Want To Do?

2010-03-06T11:01:00.003-07:00

Don't you want to be better person? I don't mean that we're bad people, but that we desire to grow and develop our character. Do you like who you are? I like me a lot more now than I did 40 years ago! Do you have a list of things you'd like changed? Here are a few of mine:

I can still get angry when offended. Clear thinking doesn't result from anger! I'd like to rise above anger.
I don't like traditional approaches to anything. Maybe because I'm an auditor, or because of my rigid upbringing, I challenge everything. I'd like to be able to accept some things.
My love and respect for others is conditional. Behave badly and I'll judge you. I have no right to do that. Hurt me and I want to hurt you back.
Justify yourself like I used to, or like how I still want to, and I can tell you what's wrong with your life! That's called pride.
I can't identify very well with the needs of others. I have a mental understanding but I don't often feel much empathy. I'd like to put the needs of others first.

And that's not the bad stuff! Sometimes, the harder we work to change the way we are the harder it gets! The reason is that while we can modify some of our behavior, changing our hearts by our own strength is impossible! Why? The Apostle Paul laments about this in the Bible, Romans 7:15: "For what I am doing, I do not understand. For what I will to do, that I do not practice; but what I hate, that I do." In vs. 17, he makes a statement many find hard to believe, "...it is no longer I who do it, but sin that dwells in me."

Sin dwelling in us! Not me! How about you? This is the reason we need a Savior! We can't accomplish lasting changes in our character by our own strength. Change begins on the inside, not the outside. Only Jesus Christ can change our hearts!

Are You an Isolationist?

2010-02-27T11:50:00.002-07:00

I heard a story this week about a youth (I think she was 13 or 14) that lost her cell phone. As you might expect, she was very upset. While most adults would assume the youth was upset because she couldn't talk to her friends, she complained, "And now I can't text and I have to talk to my friends!"

This story brought back a statement by one of my grandsons while he was being treated for leukemia at age 15. Having lost his hair, which he usually wore very long, he was asked what he looked forward to when the treatment was finished. His answer was that he couldn't wait for his hair to grow long again so it would cover his eyes and he wouldn't have to look at anyone! He said, "When you make eye contact with someone, then you have to talk to them!"

Two boys, I'd say they are 17 or 18, use the running track at the the YMCA when my wife and I go for walks. Seeing one of them there for several weeks, we began to look at them in hopes of exchanging a smile. Passing within inches of them, neither would raise their eyes to look at us. Two other men that frequent the running track spend a great deal of time warming up for their run. I've made eye contact and smiled at them both only to watch them look away.

Walking through the streets of New York City on work assignments for many years, I've concluded it is a miracle when someone there makes eye contact! Walking in protective cocoons seems to be the norm. Understandably, there are reasons to protect one's self, in large cities and in small ones. I'm not sure, however, there are justifiable reasons to isolate ourselves from human interaction.

I realize this is the age of social networking on the internet. Facebook, You Tube, Twitter and a hundred other sites provide opportunities to be social. Internet dating sites allow people the opportunity to exchange information, exchange emails, and be social, all without first speaking to the other person face-to-face. This is how I see it. Technology has brought us ways to be alone in the midst of millions of people!

Admittedly, I'm not the most social person in the world. I think I was born an accountant. I'm good at putting my head down and turning out the work. I'm a good live seminar and webcast speaker because I've learned how to communicate effectively. I'm a good trainor because I've spent decades working in the trenches. Except for a few gatherings of long-time friends, I'd just as soon spend the evening in my easy chair.

Socializing face to face is work for me. For 17 years of my adult life, I was single and traveled 300 plus days a year. Essentially, I lived alone, in isolation. My contacts were always temporary. I did what I wanted when I wanted. I was free to live and do as I pleased. Much of society would applaud this as success today! I was miserable! I was so isolated, I'd go to a bar or the grocery store so I could at least be alone with people around me! This was not life, and I had to learn it the hard way!

I remember a verse of an old song, "People who need people are the most wonderful people in the world." Well, guess what! We need people, we need relationships, the face-to-face kind. All the internet sites that provide contacts with old and new friends are good, but there is more. Life is exchanged in groups and one-t0-one personal contact, even if we don't like some of the people!

So, where do you stand? Alone, aloof, apart? Or do you look into people's eyeballs and seek personal interaction? Even us old accountants need relationships! How about you?

Are You Grace-Full?

2010-02-20T08:18:00.003-07:00

What does the word mean? From the 1828 Edition of Webster's Dictionary, grace is defined as a blessing, gratuity, unmerited love and favor, privilege and virtue. The Latin word is Gratia, as in gratis or gratuity. Some say Grace before meals to thank their provider for their blessings. It's pretty clear; grace is something we give to someone, a gift. Interestingly, the Greek word for grace is "Charis" which means "gift."

So, if we are "grace-full" it must mean we are filled up with the ability to give grace to others. Sometimes, I'm not very graceful. If you've read some of my previous blogs, you already know that! When things are going my way I can be graceful. When I'm around people I like I'm graceful. There are other times I'm not. Here are a few examples of those circumstances:

A corporate entity that values it profits more than its customers. A recent visit to a corporate dental group assigned to me under my insurance plan is an example. Their "corporate policy" required me to undergo a series of expensive unnecessary services. I was told that if I didn't subject myself to these procedures they wouldn't serve me in the future! I don't have grace for people and organizations that try to increase their profits at my expense.
Religious leaders that build their fortunes by deception. A friend told me a story of attending a retirement party for an elderly preacher. My friend asked the preacher if he would do anything different given the chance to redo his career. The preacher said, "Yes, I'd get me a white linen suit, arrange a series of religious meetings and tell the participants that God told me to tell them to give me all their money!" Enough said.
People with a victim mentality that blame others for their problems. Refusing to take responsibility for their mistakes, bad decisions or inappropriate behavior and, instead, blaming family, friends, employers and others for their misfortunes are the character traits of victims. I was one for many years of my life. I blamed my mother, father, bosses and anyone else I could find for my failures and anger. I minimized my inappropriate behavior and magnified the bad behavior of others. I judged others by their actions but wanted people to judge me by my intentions. I hate seeing me in others!

Many of our life experiences have filled our hearts with wounds and hurts. We can offer human grace to a certain depth of our hearts but then we hit the rocks at the bottom! We can't be grace-full on our own strength. If we could, this planet would be filled with peace, harmony and love.

The Bible says Jesus came filled with grace and truth. His grace-full death on the cross was his "Charis" (gift) to all mankind. Only when we accept Him as our Lord and Savior, can we access His grace and become supernaturally grace-full!

What Do You Do When You Are Wronged?

2010-02-13T07:36:00.003-07:00

It happens all the time. Someone steps in line in front of you. A co-worker gets favors instead of you. People criticize your lifestyle. Another car cuts you off. From early on my first reaction was to retaliate.

My examples are many. One I remember clearly occurred in an east coast hotel while facilitating a seminar. Wall charts had been created as exercises were completed and hung on the wall for the summary to this five-day seminar. When I left the room one evening late in the week, I wrote a message on a wall chart in big red letters asking the banquets crew to not destroy my charts. Arriving in the room the next morning, you guessed it, my wall charts were gone! Unwilling to control my temper, my tirade started with the hotel manager and finally led to the person that cleaned the room. Shouting accusations of stupidity in the staff persons face, I was stopped short when he responded, "Que, Senior?" Stopped short, I realized he could not read my message written in English.

Anger and retaliation seemed justified to me then. I knew no other way! Changing my ways seem impossible to me. Life had done me wrong and I was ready to take back what had been taken from me. No one would take advantage of me.

Pretty self-centered wasn't I? My hurts and wounds had made me the most important person on earth! Infringe on my rights and you would be held accountable. I'm not sorry for your plight because you likely did it to yourself. Judgment, criticism, and condemnation were my rights! Give someone the benefit of the doubt, you've got to be kidding!

You can guess the end I'm sure. My life was empty and lonely. I literally lost everything of value to me. Bankrupt and alone, I finally realized there was more to life than me! Flying in an airplane on my 45th birthday, I asked someone for help for the first time in my life--his name was Jesus Christ.

The Bible say that Jesus came to us full of grace and truth. Only He can supernaturally impart grace that will set us free. Don't misunderstand, it didn't happen over night. In fact, it's still happening, 23 years later! Only with the supernatural power of His grace received by faith, can we become others-centered and break free of self-centeredness. His grace is His ability that becomes ours when we trust Him.

The Bible says to turn the other cheek when we are wronged. This doesn't mean we have to become whimps! It means that we are to speak the truth with grace and love with the purpose of setting others free from the same burdens we may have carried. Here's the end: With God's supernatural grace in us, our responses to wrongs can be constructive, not destructive! We can live in peace that is beyond our understanding. We can become others-centered!

Are You Bona Fide?

2010-02-05T14:59:00.003-07:00

Remember the movie, O'Brother Where Art Thou? The ex-wife of the George Clooney's character referred to her new fiancee as "bona fide." Defined in the Merrium-Webster online dictionary, it means sincere, genuine, authentic, honest, sincere, true and so on. I think time and society may have lost their regard for bona fides!

Persons held in high regard by a large part of society today are sports heroes, movie stars, politicians and some news reporters. It doesn't seem to matter if the sports heroes take steroids or suck on a bong, if the movie stars are adulterers or wife beaters, if the politicians purse their personal agendas rather than the will of the people or if news reporters constantly bias their reporting to support their political leanings. I don't know about you, but I can't identify many people in these professions that are bona fide!

My definition of bona fide is simply behaving ethically! Behaving ethically is treating others as we'd like to be treated and not satisfying our personal desires through fraud or deception. Behaving ethically is living every aspect of one's life with the highest level of integrity, even if no one is watching! Be bona fide!

Can You Detect Unethical Behavior?

2010-01-29T15:10:00.006-07:00

Maybe you've watched the crime solving TV program, "Lie to Me." I sometimes chuckle when I watch the lead character peering into the face of suspects as if he can see the truth in the pores of their skin! Yes, I know body language, expressions and gestures can betray the spoken word and there are experts that can discern these circumstances. For many of us, however, detecting unethical or criminal behavior is a little more difficult!

A partner in a CPA firm that attended one of my seminars related this story. The CPA was asked to submit a proposal to audit a larger non-profit organization in his community. The CPA arranged an initial meeting with the executive director to discuss the organization, its accounting and internal control systems and to obtain financial information. After the meeting, the CPA shared that he couldn't point to anything specific but had a bad feeling about the director. Recognizing this could be either his intuition or too much pizza for lunch, the CPA invited the director to play golf with his foursome Saturday. Upon completing the round, the CPA told the director he would not be submitting an audit proposal. His reason? The director cheated on his score on every hole of the golf course!

The CPA shared he had witnessed a character flaw in an individual that is often a symptom of a greater problem. About a year later the director's name appeared in newspaper headlines because he had embezzled funds from the non-profit organization! A good call I'd say!

I'm an old auditor and would be the last to say our best means of detecting unethical behavior is our intuition. But I would say that we honor our intuition far too little in our relationships with others. Unethical behavior is a fruit of a deeper root. The fruit is usually obvious if we pay attention!

Do Your Actions Speak Louder Than Your Words?

2010-01-23T09:58:00.004-07:00

Before we were married, my wife thought I was a "straight-laced CPA." Probably, because I was! Well after all, I'm a CPA and have a professional image to maintain, or so I reasoned. She has said that even when I have fun, it's work. She's right. My upbringing taught me how to perform to get accolades and avoid criticism.

While I have grown some, I still have to make sure what I do isn't performance to get "attaboys," or to sway the opinions of others. The truth is that most of us perform some. Others are affected by our performance, at least for a little while. Eventually, however, hidden things will be revealed. Maybe I should say the hidden "self" will be revealed. My self-serving purposes will eventually become evident when what I do and say doesn't align with what's in my heart. In other words, I can only survive doing and saying good for a short time if I'm faking it. In some way, the truth will come out because my actions speak louder than my words!

If you are a parent and make a promise to your child, you better make it good. If you are a businessman that tells employees your primary objective is to help them accomplish theirs, you better make sure you share your profits. If you are a pastor that tells a congregation your goal is to help them live a better life, occasionally you should consider passing the offering plate and telling them to take something out! If you are a politician that insists serving the needs of constituents is the primary purpose of holding office, your actions better back up your words.

Here's the bottom line. Words are empty unless they come from one's heart and are backed by unselfish actions. When we're not genuine in our words or actions, others will know it!

Why Is There Such Death and Destruction in Haiti?

2010-01-16T08:23:00.005-07:00

I can barely stand watching the news reports of the devastation in Haiti. My heart, like yours I'm sure, breaks with the images of the injured and the dying. Children without their parents or a home may be the worst part. Like other natural disasters, life as usual is changed in an instant. Business doesn't matter. Ethical behavior doesn't matter. Our 401K doesn't matter. Plans for the future don't matter. Only survival does!

Like many of us, you may be asking why. Why did this happen to one of the poorest nations on earth? Why did people that had almost nothing lose even that? Why the death and devastation? Some would answer and say those faults have been under that city for centuries. True, but the destruction came now. Some would say that it is the judgment of God on the sin, on the devil worship and on the lawlessness that has reigned in that nation. This also may be true but these evils are embedded in the history of the nation. Still others would say it is chance. Volcanic eruptions, tsunamis, earthquakes, floods, droughts and other natural disasters are occurring more frequently around the world, and it's probably not chance!

Whether or not one believes in God, we must understand that the earth has a timetable. Nostradamus thought so. The Mayans thought so. Even science thinks so! As we are busy living life, however, we don't want to think so! If we don't think about it, we don't have to deal with some difficult issues. Who am I? Where did I come from? Where am I going when I leave the earth? It's pretty easy to think that we just stop, or that we go into the light, or that we become angels or that this life is all there is. I hope you know that none of this kind of reasoning is truth.

Natural laws have been established on this earth. We're familiar with gravity, thermodynamics, physics, planting and harvesting and so on. The natural law we like to ignore, however, is that sin has consequences! Collective sin has even greater consequences! If you don't believe me, you need to read a publication that has been proven accurate by historians, archeologists, lawyers and many others...the Holy Bible.

The consequences of sin will be reaped on earth or in the "after life." To die is to leave this earth for an eternal destiny, either heaven or hell. We don't get a chance to choose after the earthquake hits! But, we can choose now! Jesus' recorded words in John 14:6, "I am the way, the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through Me." Jesus is the only savior that died to pay the price for our sin. When we ask him in prayer to be our Lord and Savior, and believe in our hearts that God raised Him form the dead, we will be saved! He will forgive our sin and make the way for us to be filled with His righteousness and love! Are you ready for what might happen on earth tomorrow, or even in the next few minutes? Make your choice now!

Why Can't Christians Say What They Believe?

2010-01-09T13:03:00.003-07:00

In the past couple of weeks, many news reports and commentators' opinions have had a spot on Tiger Woods' reported sex addiction. Many of the commentators expressed their opinion about what he should do to overcome the scandal and the addiction.

On Fox News a couple of days ago, Brit Hume voiced his opinion about what Tiger Woods should do to get set free of his reported sex addiction and to get on with his career. To paraphrase, he said that Tiger Wood's professed faith in Buddhism couldn't set him free and the only religion that had that capability was Christianity through faith in Jesus Christ. He used "that name" and the media came unglued. Paraphrasing the responses, Brit Hume is a reprehensible, unprofessional, indiscriminate commentator. I wonder if the outcry would have been as loud if he had suggested Tiger Woods read the Koran and pray several time during the day!

Keith Oberman argued the news media shouldn't be a platform for proselytizing. Wikipedia's definition of Proselytizing is the act of attempting to convert people to another opinion and, particularly, another religion. Like every other commentator that has weighed in on this scandal, Brit Hume expressed his opinion. If he was proselytizing, my opinion is that they all were!

So, why can everyone but Christians say what they believe? Specifically, why can't a Christian use the Name of Jesus Christ without causing offense? I posed the question from the standpoint of a Christian because it's acceptable to use His name while calling Him a lunatic or a liar, or while swearing!

Here is my opinion. Jesus Christ, whether people believe in Him or not, holds the power of eternal life and death. He is the absolute source of ethical behavior; He is The Truth. For a non-believer to acknowledge Him as a source of wisdom and as a standard for ethical behavior would be admitting that their belief system could be wrong. Since their belief system is their identity, admitting its possible error could be emotional suicide. Worse yet, it would be admitting that they are accountable to someone and that they can't do and say what they want without retribution. In short, they're afraid they can't practice their religion, secular humanism!

Since Jesus was born, His Name has been hated. The New Testament of the Holy Bible contains historical documentation of this fact. Denial of His existence, criticism of Him and His followers, and legally restricting the speech and actions of Christians doesn't change The Truth. The Words of Christ, the New Testament of the Bible, are the only absolute standards for ethical behavior!

What Is Your Resolution?

2010-01-02T09:04:00.004-07:00

It's that time again. It's January and New Year's resolutions are the substance of the media one more time. It is reported that some are resolving to lose weight, to quit smoking, to change their lifestyles, to get a better job and so on. For most of us, our resolutions almost always center on ourselves. I can't remember a news reporter interviewing someone that said, "I want to make the world a better place" or "I'm resolving to help others more" or "I'm going to demonstrate love for my neighbor this year."

I'm reading a book by Joyce Meyers called "The Love Revolution." She says that selfishness is behind almost every problem the world faces today. I'd go one step further and say self-centeredness is the primary cause. And why shouldn't it be? It began in the Garden of Eden!

I lived the first 45 years of my life as a "self-made" man. The only thing my lifestyle made was a mess! When my world began to collapse my defense was to blame others for my problems. And why not? Adam blamed Eve and Eve blamed the serpent! The devil made me do it!

One of my favorite lines from the movie Gladiator was when General Maximus said to his men before a battle, "What you do here today will echo throughout eternity!" We will be accountable to God for the things we do here on earth, whether or not we believe in Him! Self-centeredness in the Garden of Eden brought spiritual death to all mankind throughout eternity. We are mankind!

But there is good news! "For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life." (John 3:16) God first loved us so we could love him...and others! He made the Way in Jesus Christ for us to escape our self-centeredness and to become "others-centered." In the end, the only resolution that will matter is whether we have resolved to love God and one another. This is true ethical behavior! We can become resolute this year and point the Way!

What Do You See When You Look at Others?

2009-12-19T09:57:00.002-07:00

At the end of each seminar I teach, participants prepare an evaluation of their perception of my performance. In each seminar, some of the comments have nothing to do with learning but, instead, are criticisms of my personal mannerisms, tone of voice or appearance. Most of these criticisms are totally opposite of the majority but I've often wondered what could motivate these comments.

In the seminar business there are a lot of variables. Most attend to learn but some come to be entertained, some attend because they are required to and others because of convenience. Their reasons for attending, the quality of text materials and slides and the quality of the facility shape some of their opinions of the experience. This rarely explains, however, why some seem compelled to write personal criticisms.

I used to criticize others because it made me feel superior. Sometimes I did it out of ignorance and other times it was purposeful. Most times it was because I saw in others what I disliked in myself! I disliked many people because they were much like me!

Maybe you've heard the saying, "We like to judge others because of their behavior but want others to judge us based on our intentions." That was (and still sometimes is) me! Several years ago when I was head usher at a church, a woman attended whose behavior was bizarre. After several months of trying to love her as Christians are directed to do, my wife and I talked to our pastor about her behavior and questioned why he hadn't corrected her. Our pastor listened to our criticism and then asked us some piercing questions. "What do you know about her and her background?" "Have you invited her to your home or some of your social events?" "Do you have any idea of why she behaves in these ways?" Slinking out his office door, we realized we had been judging this person simply be what she did and said, not by who she really was.

I read an article by Rick Joyner (www.morningstarministries.org) recently in which he encouraged readers to see others as God sees them. He explained that God sees us, not as we are, but as who and what we can become. God's ways are different than ours, but we can change! How we see others contributes to who they become! Try it sometime!

You Can Get Free From Fear!

2009-12-12T06:59:00.003-07:00

My wife and I have two Labrador Retrievers, Sarah and Isaac. Isaac is the first-born son of Sarah and he's my dog. In fact, he worships me! From the time he was a pup (he's 12 now) he was 6 inches from my heels. When I'd come from a trip, he'd whine and whimper with a smile on his face because he was so glad to see me.

When he was younger, Isaac had some bad habits; he liked to eat my wife's socks, not mine just hers. I'd swat him with a newspaper when he did this but he loved me anyway. One day he found a printer ink cartridge under my desk and you can guess the rest. Ink all over the beige carpet! In my anger, I swatted him with the newspaper several times, and harder than usual as I scolded him. Out of fear, he bared his teeth and snarled at me for the first time. At that moment, he didn't worship me!

We humans are not that much different. Fear causes us to do crazy things, the least of which is to push us into the fight or flight mode. At those times, we can lose touch with reality. Like Isaac, sometimes we respond out of instinct. The difference is that you and I respond out of what is in our hearts.

Kenny Huffman beat up on me when I was in the third grade and I couldn't fight back. For most of my life after that, when I was threatened by someone or something I bared my teeth and snarled. I was quick to throw the first punch so to speak, verbal not physical. It took me 45 years to learn I couldn't break free of the fear in my heart on my own.

I don't know what is in your heart this Christmas season that may be causing you to fear. The Bible says the root of all fear is the fear of death. If you haven't already, this Christmas season make sure you accept God's free gift, Jesus Christ. When you ask him into your heart, His Holy Spirit will begin to heal and remove the root of fear, eternal death. Snarl no more! Enjoy His peace! (John 14:27: "Peace I leave with you, My peace I give to you; not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid."

What Time is it?

2009-12-05T09:28:00.003-07:00

It's the holiday season, of course! A time for giving, a time for family, a time for reflecting on the past year, a time for planning for next year and a time for considering the needs of others.

The temperature where I live has dipped below zero and there is some snow. I'm grateful I have a warm house; some don't. Holiday meals are being planned and I'm very grateful we have money to buy food; some don't. We are planning to get together with some of our family members to celebrate Christmas and I'm grateful for that; some are alone.

The truth is I sometimes take our blessings for granted. Only two years ago, we'd experienced a business failure and were left with no money and huge debt. During this time my wife broke her ankle and was bed-fast for 3 months. Through this time, friends and family brought food and supplies that enabled us to always have enough. Having been in a similar situation several years before, we have an understanding of what it's like being without.

With the support of friends, and out trust in God, we survived and were blessed incredibly. This holiday season, the celebration of the birth of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ, many people need to see Him in flesh and blood; they need you and me!

It's Not All About Me or You!

2009-11-26T08:51:00.003-07:00

If you've studied or read about quantum physics, you know that an underlying theory is that we all are a part of the whole, that we are connected in some way. In other words, what we believe and do affects those in our areas of influence. Whether or not we believe the theories of quantum physics, it is true our behavior influences those around us, for good or for bad.

The truth is that most of us are self-centered. That may seem harsh but I doubt few of us have often sacrificed for others to our own hurt. In good times and bad, in the United States at least, we are after what is good for us and what makes us happy.

There is a principle in the Bible called "sowing and reaping." Some churches have used that principle to motivate people to give and to fill church coffers. Whether some admit it or not, sustaining their church or organization is at the root of the teaching. Self-centered was the word I used above. Even if the motive is to serve constituents, the end does not justify the means.

The principle of sowing and reaping, interestingly, is a natural law, like gravity for example. It works in both positive and negative ways. It works whether we believe it or not! How we treat and relate to others today, mirrors how we'll be treated tomorrow.

I know someone whose entire life has been focused on themselves, on their desires and needs. This person does think about others' needs, and even tries to serve others from time to time. Underlying the things the person does, however, is their focus on what they can get back for themselves. This is self-centeredness!

We have to learn how to be "others-centered." Our motives to serve others must first come from a genuine desire to make positive contributions in our circles of influence, not from a desire for personal gain. Yes, it means giving up some of our own desires. The end result is, however, that we will get back more than we give!

The Danger of False Expectations

2009-11-21T08:30:00.003-07:00

Some of us don't enjoy communications with others. It may result from our behavior style, a dislike of interaction with others, control motives, our business environment or a hundred other reasons. Whatever the reason, a common result is false expectations of the behavior of others.

When we fail to get the other side of the story, so to speak, most actions we take are centered on ourselves. We look at things from our own point of view and, even though we may spend considerable time thinking about a situation, our actions almost always include expectations of the the response of others. Because these expectations are generally shaped from our own perspective, the responses of others are often different from what we expect.

For many years when I had a business decision to make or when my wife and I faced a significant mutual decision, I'd think about the situation, resolve my concerns and then decide what to do. Once I'd decided, I told my wife what I, or we, were going to do. It took me a lot of years to recognize she needed time to process the situation and my decision. My expectations were that she would just go along with me, and those were false expectations! I'm a little better now but not completely cured!

As you might expect, decision-making in our home usually had pain connected with it! That's the danger of false expectations. When we've determined in our minds what another person should do in response to our plans, it's rare that our self-centered expectations will come to pass. Whether it's a husband and wife team, a business team or other groups of people working toward a common goal, communication and personal interaction go a long way to eliminating the negative results of false expectations.

Post a comment and share how you handle these situations.

Valuing People

2009-11-14T15:11:00.002-07:00

I spend a lot of time in hotels and airports while traveling for my work. A lot of the time my mind is on an upcoming event, meeting my deadlines or just getting to my destination. People pass me by and often their presence doesn't even register with me.

The custodian removing trash from the bins, the airline agent behind the ticket counter, the maid in the hallway, the groundskeeper sweeping cigarette butts from the sidewalks or the businessperson hurrying down a concourse all have value. They have value in what they do but, most of all, they have value as people.

The problem is many people have lost sight of their value. Life can be hard and it's not often we have another person express their appreciation of who we are. Telling another person what you like about them is an interesting experience. I had that opportunity last week with a number of young accountants in one of my seminars.

After I finished expressing my appreciation for each one individually, one of the men shared he realized it was time to pay attention to some of the things he needed to change about himself to be a better person. Another man shared he hadn't realized a major strength of his personality. A young woman had tears in her eyes as I spoke my recognition of attributes she longed for others to see in her.

Whether they admit it or not, deep inside everyone wants others to like and appreciate them. We have the opportunity to give bouquets to every person we meet! Post a comment and share an example from your experience of offering appreciation to others.

Taking Offense is a Choice

2009-11-08T16:17:00.002-07:00

On my flight to a seminar today, a person behind me kept getting out of their seat by grabbing the top of my seat and pulling themselves up. Each time the person did so, my head was snapped back and forth by the movement. Trying to work, I was interrupted each time. In my younger days, this and other annoyances caused me to take offense...quickly. The result was a sarcastic comment that either wounded or infuriated the other person and caused verbal strife.

It's taken me years but I've finally learned that I can choose to get angry or not. We usually get angry because we want to. We usually take offense because we want to. Whether it's hurt feelings, wounded pride or asserting our rights, the result is almost always some form of strife. Strife is the best way I know of the spend energy negatively. Strife can cause high blood pressure, ulcers and every manner of illness known to man. Strife hinders our ability to think clearly and react properly. Whatever wounds and hurts we've stored in our hearts comes out during strife. Strife makes us like a tube of toothpaste, whatever is on the inside comes out when we get squeezed!

What can we do to stop before we get there? First, we can decide not to enter into strife and stay at peace. My wife started doing this years ago and it probably saved our marriage. Not entering in will involve walking away from a situation for a time, keeping our mouth closed, using soft instead of harsh words and, for some of us, asking for God's grace to help.

Rarely does much positive come out of strife. Whatever does could likely be achieved more quickly and with much less energy peacefully. If resolution of strife isn't possible, leave it alone. Usually in a short time both parties realize their "bad" and difference are easily resolved.

Aside from the "baseball bat approach," what is your favorite way of avoiding offense and strife? Post a comment and share.

Have You Received the Fruit of Your Labor?

2009-10-31T11:08:00.006-06:00

This blog is for those of us that have tried our best to behave ethically and do right throughout our lifetimes and haven't been rewarded. We've served others in business, church and relationships but seem to end up on the short end of the stick. We've tried and tried to do right but what we wanted and expected didn't happen. We've cried out in our alone times, "Were is mine?" Some of us have become disillusioned and discouraged and even quit trying. If this is you, this blog is for you.

Here are a few things I've learned through some of these times. I've worked hard at everything I've undertaken in my life but failed a lot. My failures usually occurred not because I didn't do a good job but because I was doing the wrong job! A dog barking up the wrong tree as the old saying goes. Trying to be like other successful people doing something I thought I was to do often led me to the wrong place, or in some cases no place! Trying to perform and compete to be better than others caused me to be exhausted most of the time and not do my best. I worked hard to please and be accepted by others, which made my sense of failure worse when they didn't appreciate my performance. Driven by my heart motives, I was trying hard to get to the wrong place! I never received the fruit (rewards) of my labors. I failed to accomplished my goals in other words.

Because I was working hard and exhausted most of the time, I had little time to be quiet to hear the still, small voice inside me. Whether or not one believes in God or His creation, we are equipped with an inner sense, some people call it a voice, that is constantly trying to tell us the right thing to do. For those that have accepted Jesus Christ as Lord and Savior, that voice is recognized as the Holy Spirit of God. In any event, our inner sense, intuition or urging will direct us for good if we listen and follow it.

When my last major project failed, I actually gave up trying to do anything. I remember saying to God, "If there is anything left in my life for me to do, you have to open a door and bring it to me." It was only a few months until doors of opportunity that I had tried to push through in years past began to open...wide. I still had to do the work but it was work that was given to me, not something I had to perform to get. Since then there have been some difficult situations develop but as I trust Him to take me to my destiny I keep making progress.

Here is the bottom line. Jeremiah 29:ll says, "For I (God) know the plans I have for you, plans to prosper you and not to harm you; plans to give you hope and a future." Hard for some of us to accept, but the Infinite (God) is greater than the finite (us). When I try to make my own way on my own strength, it's hard. When I cooperate with what God has given me, its easy because He is God and I'm not! Post a comment and share your story.

Are You Working Too Hard?

2009-10-24T09:03:00.005-06:00

The purpose of this question is to cause us to focus on why and how we do things. Most of my life I've performed to get others to accept and like me, as well as to achieve my goals. I said I didn't care if they liked me but deep down I did. So, I endeavored to be the best at my work, tried to make others feel comfortable, tried to please my wife and friends and on and on.

I've always been goal-oriented. When I have a purpose before me, I usually spend 110% of my energy and time working towards an accomplishment. In fact, I usually work until I wear out!

This behavior fits with my upbringing, which could be defined as performance orientation. This has always been my subconscious reasoning: the harder I work, the greater the rewards or maybe the more others will like and respect me. It is true that hard work has its rewards but, for some of us, our thinking is rooted in "good boy, bad boy" (or girl) heart motives. When the reasons for performance moves from accomplishing an objective to satisfying dysfunctional needs, we push ourselves to the end of our strengths.

I've been blessed with some new and different work lately. Because I always want to do a good job, I've been working extra hard and long to do the new projects correctly. Planning to work this weekend, I awoke exhausted this morning. A different kind of wake-up call, this usually tells me I'm relying too much on my own strength to meet real or self-imposed deadlines and that I NEED REST!

I forget that when I have adequate rest, I am stronger both physically and mentally. God rested on the seventh day; we need to rest! We can usually accomplish more in less time than when we keep continually pushing ourselves towards a goal. When we slow down or stop for a day or so, we can recharge. Taking our focus off our work enables us to see more clearly how to get where we're going and what we need to change to get there.

Remember the old song? It was by Carly Simon I think:

"I can see clearly now, the rain is gone.
I can see all the obstacles in my way.
All the darkened clouds of gloom are gone.
It's gonna be a bright, bright sunshiny day!"

Try, Try and Try Again

2009-10-19T13:09:00.002-06:00

I started a new direction in my training activities today with the launch of 15 weeks of webcasts. Having performed 5 0r 6 webcasts in the past, and having taught live seminars for over 30 years, I thought this would be a simple transition. While my debut was not bad, I failed to allocate time effectively and ended up very rushed to finish on time. This caused my listeners to feel they didn't receive complete coverage of my subject.

Perhaps you've been there. Thinking you could meet the requirements of a task, you finish to find out your performance was less than perfect. How we respond in these circumstances tells a lot about our progress to maturity. I'm still working on getting there!

I have known some who don't take criticism well. Being presented with information that indicates they are less than perfect, their reaction is often blame shifting, denial of facts and even anger. On the other hand, I've worked with many people who welcome constructive criticism and use it to improve.

In my younger years, I used to tell critics to keep their mouths shut. "I'm my own worst critic," I would say. That was probably true since my performance orientation always drove me to seek perfection. The truth is I did need the constructive criticism, and still do! My substandard performances still make me feel bad but, in my later years, I've learned to use the information to be better next time. Using the input of others as we try, try and try again not only helps us do a thing better, it is a mark of maturity.

Are you still trying? Post a comment and share your self-assessment!

If I Don't Toot My Horn No One Will

2009-10-10T10:52:00.006-06:00

I spent most of my life trying to make my way. I was aggressive, self-confident and, frankly, prideful. I was proud of what I had accomplished and I was quick to tell you so. I believed that nothing good happened to me unless I made it happen. That worked well until one day I awoke to find all I thought I had slipped through my fingers into failure.

Not once but several times in my life I got caught up in what some call the rat race. None of those situations succeeded. While we should work hard to achieve our life goals, we must be aware that our original intent and purposes can take a back seat to satisfying our personal needs for achievement. This is the test of success!

Our achievements satisfy a need for recognition and acceptance inherent in many of us. It's much like a narcotic or alcohol; it makes us feel good and we want more! Soon, achieving becomes our goal instead of what we set out to do. Everything and everyone around us blurs as we set our sites on the next accomplishment.

People that behave as I once did aren't hard to spot. No matter what they say, every project, every relationship and every action is calculated to benefit themselves. Self-aggrandizement, self-promotion and self-centeredness are words that describe this behavior.

Sometimes this behavior is subtle and hard to spot. The person it controls is often at the center of the "now" thing, often is seen associating with higher ups and appears very popular. Many fail to discern the true heart motives of such persons and are caught up in the feigned enthusiasm and success of self-promoters only to be used and discarded. Once the ant enters the spider's web, only pain will follow!

Beware of the unethical behavior of the self-promoter! From such, flee! Post a comment and tell us about your experiences with such persons.

Are You Good at Self-Exhaltation?

2009-10-03T09:53:00.003-06:00

I worked hard for years to sell myself in business, relationships and church. In all of these circumstances, I only felt accepted if my performance was what those over and around me expected or wanted. In fact, I was trained this way as a child. It was "good boy" when I did the right thing; "bad boy" when I didn't. When I messed up, I always tried to cover up, i.e., hide the mistake or attempt to make it seem trivial. All the while, I was selling myself to cover my perceived inadequacies.

On my first job in public accounting I made so many mistakes I was sure I'd be fired every afternoon. I remember the feelings of inadequacy when I went to work for an international CPA firm and received continual criticism for not performing up to expectations. In these and other circumstances, I worked harder, longer and faster than others to cover up my low self-esteem. I told everyone I was the best at what I did even though I didn't believe it! I was good at exalting myself over others.

Old habits are hard to break. My self-esteem has improved through the years as I actually became good at the things I do. Doing things for recognition has given way to learning to be who God made me to be. But the child inside me sometimes still wants to sell himself to be accepted. I has become such a life pattern that I sometimes do it without realizing what I'm doing. For example, someone in one of my recent seminars was offended because they felt my introduction and other comments were self-aggrandizing. This person may have been right because I did what I always do!

I'm very critical of others that exalt themselves, particularly those in leadership positions. It's taken me a long time to understand that, when I perceive the behavior of others in a negative light, God is probably holding up a mirror to my face! The Bible says in Luke 18:14, "...for everyone who exalts himself will be abased, and he who humbles himself will be exalted." The truth is self-exaltation is pride. Pride is the opposite of humility. Pride blocks our success. Humility makes the way for us to be all we can be! More on the power of humility in a future post. Post a comment and share your story!

The Way We've Always Done Things

2009-09-27T17:50:00.002-06:00

If it's not broken, don't fix it! Too often I'm happy with the ways I've always done things. I'm usually proactive in my approach to business but my ways of doing things are often rooted in tradition...mine!

On the DISC behavioral profile, I'm a high D and a high C, i.e., highly dominate and highly compliant (rules oriented). Once I adopt a way of doing a thing, I frequently repeat the behavior routinely without thinking. This is both good and not so good.

My behavioral style is good because I make decisions easily and accomplish tasks quickly. It's not so good because I'm often insensitive to the thoughts and needs of others. In other words, they way I've always done things works for me but it may not work for others. My ways may even hurt or offend others.

Good interpersonal skills will always put the needs of other persons first. This requires us to step out of our normal behavior patterns and to become "others centered." To become more effective leaders, we need to think about the needs and objectives of others before we act or speak. When we approach our jobs and relationships in this way, our old ways will rarely impair our success. What do you think?

The Other Person's Point of View

2009-09-21T15:51:00.003-06:00

In previous blogs, we've discussed how a person's heart motives, life experiences and learned behaviors affect their ethics and decision-making. Generally, we decide to do what we think is right. We see and interpret facts and circumstances through rose-colored glasses, so to speak.

When my wife and I have had differences of opinion (there have been more than a few!), she has said that we're just looking at different ends of an elephant. You remember the analogy: Several sight-impaired persons holding on to different parts of an elephant (a leg, its tail, its trunk, an ear, etc.) each saw the elephant differently. Same elephant but different views. Our personal views are often derived from what we're holding on to!

I recently found my self in a conflict with a counter party to a contract. In fact, the other party terminated the contract because they believed I had violated its terms. I believed, on the other hand, that I had been careful not to violate the contract terms. After a day or so, I realized that my evaluation of compliance had been solely from my point of view. Looking at the situation from the point of view of the other party, I could see where my behavior could be considered a violation of terms. It was not my intent to violate the terms but I could see from the other person's view how I did.

I felt badly that I had made a serious mistake. Unfortunately, there was no chance to repair the damage. In these situations we can either get mad, sad or glad. I've decided to be glad for the increase in wisdom this situation has provided me! Sometimes we have to learn ethical behavior the hard way! Post a comment and share your learning experiences.

The Trust Factor of Leadership

2009-09-12T15:27:00.003-06:00

In his book entitled, "Becoming a Leader, Dr. Miles Munroe discusses many essential characteristics of a true leader. In chapter 3, page 39, Dr. Munroe addresses the trust factor:

"Integrity is the basis of trust which is a product of leadership. It is the one quality that cannot be acquired; it must be earned. It is given by co-workers and followers and without it, the leader cannot function. 'Trust is the product of time and integrity."

Leaders are individuals whose characters have been tested, proven and established as being faithful and trustworthy. Trustworthiness is a product of character and competence, that is who you are and what you can do. Trustworthiness is the foundation of trust. To become an effective leader you must earn the trust and confidence of others."

How often we hear a politician, a CEO, preacher or a president say, "Trust me." The Bible tells us we are to evaluate leaders by their fruit, the results of their behavior. TALK IS CHEAP! At this time in society when people call good evil and evil good, we must follow the true leaders. We can forgive the faults of our leaders, but our trust must be earned. Anybody rated high on your scorecard today? Tell us about that person!

Whose Report Do We Believe?

2009-09-04T15:42:00.003-06:00

As bystanders to the political debate over health care, whose words do we accept as true? A barrage of disingenuous television ads, newspaper articles and unsolicited emails attempt to sway us to a person's or a party's way of thinking. Misinformation, claims without supporting facts and blatant lies cloud a clear understanding of the facts. How do we know who is telling the truth and who isn't?

Biblical principles tell us to judge a person by their fruit, whether it's good or it's bad. In some cases, that is easy; in others, it's not! In politics, most fruit is hybrid. As it grew from a pure blossom to eatable fruit, it was contaminated by compromise, personal agendas and even corruption. In fact, one might conclude there is no longer any such thing as good political fruit!

I'm going out on a limb to submit there is only one valid set of standards to measure the words of another. Those are the standards of the creator of heaven, earth and all that is within them. I'm sure some will say, "I don't believe in God." To them I'd respond, it doesn't matter what you believe about God.

While documented in the Holy Bible, the life of person Jesus the Nazarene was also documented by many Jewish historians that lived during his time. To born-again Christians, Jesus is the only begotten Son of God, Lord and Savior of their lives. He lived his life to demonstrate God's principles of truth. Whether or not one believes in God, the life and behavior of the historical Jesus demonstrates standards of right living. His life demonstrates truth and is the only absolute standard one can use to determine truth.

So, here it is. If any person, government official, politician, news reporter, corporate leader, president, congressperson, senator, preacher, friend or foe, speaks words or takes actions that are contrary to the documented life of Jesus, they are not truth and should not be accepted or tolerated. In a court of law, a witness is required to swear his/her testimony is the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth, so help them God! Anything short of that is a lie, spoken by a liar! Whose report will you believe?

Do As I Say, Not As I do

2009-08-31T08:36:00.002-06:00

We hear a lot about the "tone at the top" these days. In discussions of business, politics or church, the character of leaders is often made public in the media. What we've come to understand is that not all leaders do as they say. Some CEOs promote a code of conduct but backdate documents to their advantage. Most political leaders criticize the behavior of other politicians and then cover up or justify their own similar behavior. Some church pastors criticize other pastors and, yet, live with sin in their own lives.

Despite ethical codes of conduct and Biblical standards of behavior, we like to do what we like to do! Oops! I included you and I with the visible ones. It's time to be honest. I know the right things to do. Sometimes, I just don't want to do them! I don't want you to know that, however, because I think I could lose the high regard I believe you have for me! If I can tell everyone what is wrong with the world then maybe I can change it, myself excluded of course. Hopefully, I will be remembered in history as a person that did good, even though I wasn't! Silly, isn't it?

Hypocritical behavior only produces temporary change. Rules made by people for the purpose of controlling or manipulating others have no lasting effects. Only the demonstration of genuine, good character can have leave a positive legacy for others. In the movie Gladiator, General Maximus said it clearly. He stirred his men to demonstrate "strength and honor" by this phrase, "What you do here today will echo throughout eternity." Then, he did what he said!

Caring and Compassion vs. Judgment

2009-08-27T08:02:00.003-06:00

I have to admit it. Sometimes I have little compassion for others. No, most of the time I don't! I want to, but the things in my heart get in the way. Take people that are suffering, for example, financially, physically or in other ways. Financially because they've lived beyond their means for years or physically because they've not taken care of their bodies. Or when they've lived a lie or made stupid decisions that have brought hurtful consequences. I struggle with caring and having compassion for these people. My natural tendency is to judge them, at least in my mind. How about you?

I don't know about you, but I usually end up feeling guilty about my judgments of others, about my lack of compassion. Guilt comes mostly because I do or have done the same things! Worse than being a hypocrite, I know my judgments can affect the ability of other persons to grow beyond their faults. I also know what I sow, I reap!

My mother, for example, lived in fear most of the later years of her life. Fear is high on the list of items I judged quickly and I spoke about her fear often. One day someone rebuked me for my condemning words. This person told me that change could only happen when I stopped judging her with my words. I stopped and she began to change! Not only that, I began (I said began!) to judge others less often.

For change to happen in our lives, caring and compassion must go beyond tolerance of others faults. Our actions must line up with our heart motives. Our heart motives can only change by making change a priority and by seeking divine counsel and assistance. Seeking revelation of God's words in the Holy Bible, meditating on scriptures, seeking instruction from seasoned mentors and developing relationships with other like-minded persons provide a framework for change. Whether in business or in our personal lives, our ability to care and have compassion for others is a crucial building block in developing our ethics for success!

Do Codes of Conduct Ensure Ethical Behavior?

2009-08-22T09:02:00.002-06:00

With the passage of the Sarbanes-Oxley Act in 2002 came the requirement for publicly-held companies to establish and communicate a code of conduct for their businesses. Most professions, like the CPA profession, have had codes of conduct for decades. Many governmental entities and their employees are required by law to adhere to certain ethical practices. Listening to the daily news, however, may cause us to wonder if any of these codes of conduct work! In this blog and several to follow, I'll discuss this important issue.

In past blogs, I've discussed the impact of heart issues on our behavior. If the life experiences stored in our hearts lead us to unethical or even criminal behavior, a code of conduct probably won't change us. On the other hand if we are unaware of acceptable standards of behavior, the framework of such a code may help us discern right from wrong.

Perhaps a more important issue affecting the results of establishing a code of conduct are its underlying principles. Are they created by man for the benefit of man or are the principles rooted in a stronger power? In other words, are the principles based on man's standards or are they God's? Whether we believe in God or not, many business leaders have learned that principles demonstrated by the historical life of Jesus Christ are highly effective in business. A book written by a well-known business consultant, Laurie Beth Jones, entitled Jesus, CEO--Using Ancient Wisdom for Visionary Leadership, is an excellent source of study if you are interested.

In this series of blogs, I'll present components of a business code of conduct based on God's standards from the Holy Bible. Many of these principles have been incorporated in the business practices of small and large businesses; they are the foundation of ethics for success! Come follow me on this journey!

Has Lying Become an Acceptable Business Practice?

2009-08-17T16:16:00.002-06:00

While a friend was visiting from out of state, the transmission on his van began leaking. Since there was no loss of functionality, he drove the van to a new car dealership for inspection. The service consultant explained an internal seal had broken and the metal around the seal was damaged, which required replacement of an expensive part. The original repair estimate of $700 was now $2,100! Not only did the repair estimate triple, the service consultant said the part had to be shipped in and the job could not be completed for three days! Questioned about their diagnosis, it became apparent the dealership had not disassembled the transmission and could not have known that the internal seal was broken and that the part was damaged! Some might call this scenario extortion but, at best, it is lying and is not acceptable!

Spending a few minutes on the phone with the owner of a reputable transmission service, my friend was given a worst-case repair estimate of $1,100 (including a free tow to their location). Transmission service employees worked over night and into the weekend to complete the repair job, installed several parts at no charge and enabled my friend to return to his home in time for the first school day for his children! Amazingly, the owner told my friend that he could call with his credit card number when he returned home!

What a contrast: Unethical business practices versus the highest standards of integrity! The owner of the transmission service and his employee (Colorado Transmission Service in Colorado Springs) demonstrated their servant hearts and Christian values by putting my friend's needs before their own! These are ethics for success!

The Land of the Free

2009-08-13T09:41:00.002-06:00

If I'm not mistaken, the right to free speech was given to U.S. citizens in the constitution. This includes the right to choose when to speak, what to say and how to say it. Long before the constitution, God created mankind with a free will. Free will gives us a choice in everything we do and say.

Because we have a free will and the right to free speech, we can choose to lie or tell the truth. We can speak softly or yell loudly. We can behave with the highest integrity or with the lowest morals. We can tell others to do as we say and do the opposite ourselves. We can be honest or dishonest. Whatever we consider or do in life, the choice is ours.

To make the right choice, there must be a standard to guide us. Your beliefs may not be the same as mine so your choices will likely be different than mine unless we both use the same standard. When we are no longer free to choose a standard, we are no longer free. When we are told what we must believe or do by a government, by an employer or by a church, erosion of freedom has begun.

You may be aware that our government has asked that we inform officials of individuals that are critical of government policies and proposed legislation, particularly government-run health care. You probably also have heard certain politicians say that it is un-American to speak publicly against politicians at town hall meetings. We are witnessing the heart motives of a government administration that has created its own standards which they are attempting to force on you and me. Not only are we facing severe limitations of our freedoms by the current administration, proposed health care and other legislation is intended by its proponents to be the only standard we can choose. Standards for ethics, integrity and behavior will be set by bureaucrats. The land of the free will be no longer! Speak now or forever hold your peace!

The Ultimate Unethical Behavior--Deception

2009-08-08T13:27:00.003-06:00

From my study of business law years ago, I remember that contracts are only valid if both parties understand the contents of the contract. Laws have been enacted that allow unilateral cancellation of certain contracts within a number of days of signing to make sure all parties understand the effects of the contract. One of the purposes of these and other statutory protections is to prevent one party from taking advantage of another through deception.

Deception is simply defined as the act of deceiving or misleading. I suppose that act could be unintentional but in most cases there is a purpose. Years ago I purchased a vehicle from a classified ad in the newspaper. When I inspected the vehicle, the owner told me is was in good condition. After trusting his words, I found out later the engine had so many problems it needed to be misplaced! Yes, I was naive. I should have had the car checked out by a mechanic. Instead, I trusted the owner and was deceived.

You may be aware that this same situation is happening to us every day in our government. Leaders we should be able to trust are telling us how good proposed legislation will be for us as they rush to make it law before anyone, including members of congress, has time to read and understand its contents. Politicians, many of them lawyers, are voting on bills designed along party lines that they have not read in detail. With a means justifies the end attitude, the current administration is passing legislation that is more than deceptive, some of its provisions are evil!

If you don't believe me, consider just two examples. First, the Cash for Clunkers bill seems like a good deal since a lot of people get new cars. To reduce the use of fossil fuels, we're told, the older vehicles and all their parts are being destroyed. While many lower income families don't have transportation to get them to work, these "clunkers" (many of which are in decent running condition!) are being demolished. Then there is the debt on the new car. Credit got this nation into the problem we face, so more credit is going to get us out? Right. Oh, don't forget the clause in the bill that requires every computer used by dealers to file for the rebates to become government property! No deception here!

Do you have the stomach for one more example? I think most of us, regardless of political affiliation, would like to see health care for everyone. That would be good. So when we hear politicians talking about how good government-run health care will be, we trust they have our best interests at heart. In fact, we trust them so much we don't read the bill and fight to the death with anyone that is critical of its contents. One read of even a summary of the bill will reveal that the government, now our god, has the power over life and death--ours! Killing the young and the old will now be powers of bureaucrats under government-run health care! Among the many limitations of freedom in the bill, you'll also find the requirement for each of us to provide our personal banking information, along with electronic funds transfer authorization, to the highly-reliable voter registration organization, ACORN!

Here's how I see the progression: Failure to conduct the affairs of business, politics and personal lives ethically has bred unethical behavior as a norm. Most unethical behavior is supported by deception. Eventually, deception gives birth to blatant evil. Has this happened to our nation? You be the judge!

Is Bias Unethical?

2009-07-29T13:45:00.006-06:00

A recent article in the online Denver Post written by a (Canadian) clinical psychologist touted the perfection of the Canadian socialized health care system. Analytical facts were presented to illustrate that Americans have no reason to be concerned about Democratic legislation that is being formulated by congress and the president. Many blog comments following this article, however, seem to indicate that most of the facts in the article are not true.

If we assume the majority consensus of the bloggers is true, what are we to believe about the so-called facts presented by the author of the article? Do we assume that the author intentionally lied to make herself look good or to support her opinion? Probably not. Do we assume that she simply made mistakes when presenting her "facts?" Giving her the benefit of the doubt, maybe. Finally, is there a possibility that her words were shaped by personal or professional bias? This is most likely the correct answer.

Some would say that bias is simply one's expression of personal opinion about a subject or situation. Others would say that bias is a lie because it distorts the truth. From Wikipedia.com, here is a definition of bias:

"Bias is a term used to describe a tendency or preference towards a particular perspective, ideology or result, especially when the tendency interferes with the ability to be impartial, unprejudiced, or objective. In other words, bias is generally seen as 'one-sided'."

The truth is that we are all biased about certain subjects, and that isn't necessarily wrong or unethical. When biased statements are made, and represented as fact or truth however, it is wrong and unethical. Bias presented in this way is a lie!

So, you might ask, is my opinion biased? I admit it is biased. Is it wrong or unethical? I believe it is not wrong or unethical because it is based on the absolute truth of the Bible. Romans 1:18: "For the wrath of God is revealed from heaven against all ungodliness and unrighteousness of men, who suppress the truth in unrighteousness." One-sided personal or professional bias that is presented as absolute fact is a suppression of the truth and is, therefor, unethical and a lie. What's your opinion or...bias?

Should Ethical Behavior Be Legislated?

2009-07-28T08:28:00.007-06:00

When the Sarbanes Oxley Act was passed in 2002, it included a requirement for publicly-held companies to create a code of conduct for managements and employees. The content of such codes set standards of acceptable behavior and included safe-harbor provisions for whistleblowers. Under these codes of conduct, inappropriate behaviors can result in warnings, even termination.

Interestingly, many people believe these mandated codes of conduct do little to change the behavior of employees. While they may define right and wrong for some that don't have a proper understanding, persons prone to unethical behavior will likely behave unethically!

Governments pass laws to define and establish acceptable behavior. The Ten Commandments offer Judeo-Christian definitions of righteousness. Societial norms contribute to some degree of understanding of "good" and "bad." So, many ask, will mandated codes of conduct cause anyone to change their behavior?

Reported on the morning news today, the democratically-controlled House of Representatives censured the use of the words "government-run healthcare." That a governmental body would try to limit free speech is, first of all, a violation of the constitutional rights of U.S. Citizens. Secondly, it is further indication the government is no longer by the people for the people but by factions of the government for the government!

Historically, excessive governmental control has resulted in suppression of the rights of people and/or in rebellion and wars. I remember an old movie, The Network I think it was called. In a near-final scene a man stood at his window and shouted, "I'm mad as hell and I'm not going to take it anymore!" When rules favor any kind of government and become oppressive and unreasonable, cooperation is not the result!

Most will agree we need laws, regulations and even codes of conduct to define behavior. When guidelines restrict personal freedoms for the benefit of governments, managements, political parties, church leaders or individuals, however, there can be no common purpose or unity. The end is division and downfall! What is your opinion?

What You Sit Under Gets on You!

2009-07-18T07:36:00.003-06:00

In business we call it the "tone at the top." What leaders do, so will others. If leadership is honest and demonstrates high integrity, followers will behave similarly. On the other hand, the "do as I say, not as I do" philosophy will not produce honesty and high integrity. Like it or not, behavioral norms are shaped by those that influence us, directly or indirectly.

When we work for a company, subject ourselves to government leaders, listen or view biased news media or attend a church we are affected, positively or negatively. I think it was Hitler that said something like, "If you tell a lie long enough it will eventually sound like the truth!" While lying may not be the intention of many partisan politicians today, the disingenuous party line has been spoken for so long it sounds like the truth. For many business leaders, employee motivation techniques have become manipulation. For some religious leaders, serving the needs of others has become empire building instead of Kingdom building.

We can easily become like the frog placed in a pan of cool water. It doesn't recognize the temperature is being increased until it is too late. Our tolerance of lies and unethical behavior of leaders in business, government and religion gradually shapes our belief systems to be like those over us. Our consciences become seared, like with a hot iron, and we become like them! 1 Thessalonians 5:21-22 says, "Test all things; hold fast what is good. Abstain from every form of evil."

Let your "Yes" be "Yes and your "No," "No"

2009-07-13T08:54:00.004-06:00

The American Dictionary of the English Language by Noah Webster, 1828 Edition, defines "ingenuous" as "open, frank, fair, candid, and free from reserve, disguise, equivocation or dissimulation." "Disingenuous" is the opposite.

In today's politics and news reporting, the word "spin" has become synonymous with the word "disingenuous," at least in reference to spoken and written words. Questions asked are rarely answered with direct answers. Answers are designed to be non-answers and to direct listener's attention to a person's position, belief or dogma. We may hear partial truths or outright lies designed to cover the truth. Leaders may be saying one thing while their staff persons are doing the opposite. This is "spin" and it is "disingenuous!"

A passage of Scripture in Matthew 5:33-37 concludes with this: "But let your 'Yes" be 'Yes,' and your 'No, 'No.' For whatever is more than these is from the evil one." "Spin" has become normal for today's communications and, because prominent people do it, much of society accepts it as permissible. Here's the truth. "Spin," or "disingenuous" words, are LIES! Deceitful, dishonest or criminal are progressive adjectives describing the "spin" that cloaks private agendas of politicians, political parties and others in our society today.

I'm ashamed to admit that, occasionally, I have fallen prey to this societal norm. How about you?

The Ethics of the Blame Game

2009-07-10T08:23:00.003-06:00

A recent television commercial features business persons in a meeting discussing their competition's market advantage. One person makes the suggestion they take turns blaming others as he turns to the person across the table and says, "I'd like to start by blaming (name of person)." Intended as humor, this scenario is deeply serious! Sadly, the blame game affects us all.

In our country and others, what we believe often becomes the definition of who we are. Once we've adopted a belief system, we must defend that system because we must defend ourselves. When our beliefs are challenged, we retaliate. Some times we attack the beliefs of others and sometimes we blame our perceived adversaries for the fruit of our own mistakes.

As old as time, this unethical behavior began with the first man in the Book of Genesis. He blamed the woman; the woman blamed the serpent. The fear of being wrong and the pride hidden in our hearts results in regular episodes of the blame game.

From corporate managements to political leaders, news reporters and sometimes you and me, the name of the game has become blame. The Book of First John, chapter 1, verse 8: "If we say we have no sin (wrong), we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us." Ethical behavior will always cause us to "fess up" when we are in the wrong, not just when we are caught and exposed!

Perhaps our society has come to think that it's alright to be a "little" unethical if it can be justified by the end. In other words, a little blame is permissible if it enables us to achieve a good end. I once heard this on-point analogy: Walking into a convenience store to buy a bottle of water, we begin to read the labels. One bottle says 100% pure spring water. Another says 99.5% pure spring water and .5% sewage. Which one would you buy?

Has Right Become Wrong?

2009-07-08T08:36:00.005-06:00

You've undoubtedly seen, heard or read the media feeding frenzy over the resignation of Gov. Sarah Palin. An NBC interviewer last evening used her pre-designed questions, facial expressions and demeanor to paint the governor as a quitter at the end of her political career. Finally, Gov. Palin said, "You're not listening to me," as she explained again her reasons for leaving office. At the top of the list was her desire not to burden the people of the State of Alaska with the time and cost of defending herself against unfounded, outrageous allegations. She explained she could not do her job effectively and deal with the piranha attacks at the same time. Putting aside her future possibilities she has made a decision to do the right thing, even to her own hurt!

Contrast this with President Obama who, during his first term in the Senate, spent most of his time campaigning for president instead of fulfilling his sworn duties of office. I don't remember him offering to reimburse you and I for the amount of the salary he received while pursuing his presidential aspirations. Was there a media outcry over this misuse of public funds? Of course not! When an unethical practice has become the norm, no one notices. When someone does the right thing, it is an abomination!

Proverbs 14:12: "There is a way which seems right to a man, but its end is the way of death." So, what do you think? Has right become wrong?

Is Man's Wisdom Enough?

2009-07-03T08:39:00.002-06:00

You've heard sayings like, "Experience is the best teacher" or "Practice makes perfect." Old proverbs, some would call them. The question for today is, "Are these sayings really true?" Another way of phrasing the question would be, "Are our own experiences and efforts all we need for success in life or business?"

I suppose the answer depends, at least in part, on our definition of success. For many in the U.S., success is defined as wealth, position, possessions and sometimes philanthropy. In third world countries, it may simply be food for one's family. In the eternal view of things, the measure may be the fruit of our lives, i.e., how did we use what we earned or were given to serve mankind.

Here is a paraphrase of what I remember a preacher said once , "I've visited many self-made men and women as they lay on their death beds and I can't remember one of them expressing remorse that they didn't spend more time working. Their remorse was almost always for not spending more quality time with their friends and families."

Man's wisdom may say success comes from working harder and longer than others, from putting one's career above the needs of others or from using other people as stepping stones to success. God's wisdom says in Proverbs 3:5-7, "Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct your paths. Do not be wise in your own eyes; fear the Lord and depart from evil."

So, is man's wisdom enough? What would you say?

Wisdom--The Pathway to Success

2009-07-02T07:40:00.006-06:00

Whether or not one believes God created the earth and all that is in it, most can agree we all have an internal sense of right and wrong. Previous blogs have discussed how our thinking and actions are affected by our life experiences, good or bad. We all possess, however, an inner source of information that equips us to do the right thing. Many call that source "Wisdom."

When we make mistakes, Wisdom has either become clouded by past bad behavior or decisions, we seek to do what we want no matter what, or we are in too much of a hurry to listen to our consciences. Seeking and applying Wisdom will create a pathway to our success.

Wisdom is sometimes defined as the application of knowledge or understanding. However you may define Wisdom, it is a life ingredient that shapes our character, i.e., teaches us to do what is right.

Bobby is an old friend that has run an automobile repair business in a rural community for decades. In serving his customers, his policy is to honor his customers, even to his own hurt. He shared once that after replacing an engine in an expensive car, the owner ignored the new engine warning indicators for several weeks until it caught fire. The customer, of course, blamed Bobby for faulty installation. Rather than contend with and loose the customer, Bobby replaced the engine free of charge. While this wouldn't appear as Wisdom to some of us, Bobby's decision kept this customer and the word-of-mouth advertising brought him many more.

When we find Wisdom, it often takes courage and discipline to act on it. Bobby's decision to replace the engine free of charge dug deep into his business profits but he knew it was the right thing to do. Proverbs, chapter two, verses 10-11: "When wisdom enters your heart, and knowledge is pleasant to your soul, discretion will preserve you; understanding will keep you,..."

Doing the Right Thing is Always a Choice!

2009-07-01T07:10:00.004-06:00

I volunteered for several years to counsel inmates in a Colorado prison. Every inmate was incarcerated because of bad choices. Most didn't learn from their mistakes and soon returned after their release. Many had knowledge of right and wrong but, for a myriad of reasons, chose to ignore the wisdom the consequences of their mistakes afforded.

Most of these prisoners had justified their crimes in their minds. They blamed others for their wrong and minimized their responsibilities for doing the right thing (some call this the victim mentality). The truth is they ignored that still small voice some call our conscience. In fact, after living a life of wrong choices most of their consciences had been dulled or even had become nonexistent.

In Proverbs, chapter 1, verses 20-33, the consequences of wrong choices become clear. Every human being is created with an internal sense of right and wrong; we can call it Wisdom. Whether or not a person believes in God is not the point. Deciding to break our pattern of wrong decisions is. When this happens we begin to trust the Wisdom within and we can chose the right thing!

Avoid Bad Company

2009-06-30T08:26:00.003-06:00

The first time I started a CPA firm was over 30 years ago, yet I still remember the hard learned lessons. After developing a relationship with an atypical banker, I found myself on the receiving end of a number of questionable client referrals. Because I needed the cash flow, I accepted a number of clients that I knew had less than high integrity. They, in turn, referred their friends of similar character. From that list of clients, two went to jail for fraud and one sued me for a large penalty resulting from a wage and hour audit!

From chapter 1, verses 8 through 19 in the Book of Proverbs, we are warned to stay away from persons who have questionable character. We may think we can prevent their unacceptable behavior from affecting us, but that is often not the case. We may think our stand for integrity will cause them to change, but their heart attitudes usually prevent that from happening. Many well-meaning individuals have reached out to befriend unethical people and become just like them!

A man I met years ago told me he was called to "hold hands" with large number of people. He meant, of course, that he felt he was to develop business and personal relationships with a lot of people. He went on to say that there were only a few of those people, however, he was to "get in bed with." He went on to explain that only a few people could be trusted in close, personal relationships and that it was those long-term relationships he sought.

The lesson in all of this is that relationships with "good company" brings more good company. Good company helps us grow and prosper. Avoiding bad company can save our lives and our businesses!

Getting the Counsel of Others

2009-06-29T14:54:00.004-06:00

As we have discussed in previous blogs, a person's behavior is conditioned through life experiences. Because of this, our ways usually seem right to us. In fact, our desire to do or be something will often block our ability to see or understand pitfalls that may await us. What may seem normal behavior to us, may actually be extreme behavior to others!

Many investors were ruined financially by Bernie Madoff's Ponzei Scheme. While it is likely most of these investors did some background investigation of Madoff's organization before investing, the opportunity to earn large returns may have affected their decision-making. For example, rather than questioning how this organization could pay high rates of return when others could not, potential investors may have acted on persuasive comments made by their friends or other investors.

It would take both my hands and feet to count the many times I have made investments, or pursued a business or personal venture, simply because I wanted to do the thing. Often ignoring wise counsel, I plunged wholeheartedly into something that was out of its time or not for me to do. I can't count one instance of success when I have done this.

Here is a life principal that works. Proverbs, chapter 1, verse 5 states: "A wise man will hear and increase learning, and a man of understanding will acquire wise counsel." Listening, learning and understanding are the basic principles for success in business, work and life!

Ethical Principles That Work

2009-06-29T13:56:00.004-06:00

In the weeks to come, we'll be exploring a series of ethical principles from the Book of Proverbs in the Holy Bible. Whether or not you believe the Bible is God's Word, or whether or not you consider yourself a spiritual person, these Biblical principles work for you as they have worked for others for centuries.

There are two requirements, however, for these principles to work in our lives. First, we must decide to believe they will work. More than mental assent, we must believe these principles in our hearts. Second, we must apply these principles to bless others, not ourselves. A Biblical principle many call the "Golden Rule" works to cause others to treat us they way we treat them. "What we sow, we reap." In applying Biblical principles to bless others, we can create a huge tidal wave of blessings for ourselves and our families.

I observed the Golden Rule at work through an old friend years ago; his name is Steve. Steve is the person we often talk about that would "give you the shirt off his back." Steve managed rental properties for me after his layoff from a steel mill. Anything I needed done, anytime night or day, Steve would do. Steve went the extra mile for all his friends and family. If someone needed money, he was there to help even though he didn't have much himself. Steve served others with his time and his money every day we were together. He started a small residential repair business in the 1980s. From the beginning of this business, Steve and his crew have always had work, even when others didn't! Steve planted seeds that brought him an abundance of friends and life fulfillment. What Steve gave to others, he is still getting back!

The Biblical principle of sowing and reaping, like many life principles in the Book of Proverbs, is a natural law that always works. If one sows good behaviors, he/she gets a good return on investments in others. Join us in the weeks to come as we explore "ethical principles that work!"

IS IT OK TO BE LESS THAN 100% ETHICAL?

2009-05-25T08:59:00.004-06:00

The answer to this question probably depends on who you ask, when. Many Americans felt the moral indescretions of some past presidents didn't affect their ability to govern the U.S. A majority of the U.S. Congress apparently feels it is permissable to make certain obvious errors on personal tax returns since they've confirmed appointments to public office that have not filed past returns correctly. Stockholders of some large companies that have incurred significant losses must feel that huge bonuses to management personnel are acceptable since these individuals are allowed to remain in office. Some church members seem to tolerate sexual and other indescretions in their leaders since some are still leading congregations. Certain talk show hosts and motivational leaders adopt their own doctrines and philosophies which are supported by large numbers of followers even though there is no authoritative support for their opinion.

So... is it really OK to be less than 100% ethcial? Is it appropriate to justify our innappropriate behavior because others do it? Is it right to blame others for causing our indescretions? Is it right to set up our own standards of behavior as a doctrine which we expect or encourage others to live by? Are some indescretions, mistakes, or illegal behaviors unimportant?

If you ask this author, my answer to all these questions is absolutely not! If we are to conduct our lives with high integrity, we must have some common standard for behavior. Most people believe their standards are the right ones. This wouldn't be a problem if everyone believed as we do. The problems arise when we differ with others. Criminals' standards are different from most law-abiding citizens, for example. For most of us, it's not acceptable to steal, rape, molest, or murder. For some criminals, it is acceptable. Situational or behaviorial ethics of man must have a common foundation to provide accountability for inappropriate behaviors.

Only God's standards in the Holy Bible can provide a common standard for accountability. Any other standard is relavent to a lesser authority. Before I'm accused of being a self-righteous Bible thumper, let me be the first to say I am not perfect. I make mistakes, even commit sin as defined by the Holy Bible. My heart desire is to have high integrity in all areas of my life and I make a conscious effort to live that way. When I become aware of my failures, I attempt to take responsibility for my part, make amends with others and, when necessary, make restitution. Most of all, I ask my God for forgiveness for my actions or words and for His help to live according to His Way in the future.

What do you think? Should we accept or tolerate inappropriate behaviors of politicians, corporate management and church leaders? Can we justify acting in ways that seem right only in our eyes? Is it OK to be a little unethical because "everyone does it?" Post your comment!

QUALIFICATIONS FOR LEADERSHIP

2009-05-08T10:05:00.005-06:00

In Miles Monroe's book, Becoming a Leader, he makes this statement in chapter 8:

"The quality of your character is the measure of your leadership effectiveness. Effective leadership is essentially built on the foundation of inspiration that breeds confidence in one's character. In its truest form it is the perfect balance of competence, vision and virtue. Competence or knowledge without vision breeds technocrats. Virtue without vision and knowledge breeds ideologies. Vision without virtue and knowledge, breeds demagogue. True leadership cannot be divorced from the basic qualities that produce good sound character. It involves the total person and therefore cannot be relegated to a professional compartment of our lives."

In the next few blogs, we'll focus on the character necessary for effective leadership in politics, management and in our personal lives. Effective leaders must demonstrate they are worthy of the trust of followers. Followers will react negatively or positively to a leader based on a number of factors but, most importantly, they will react based on whether they think they can trust the leader's character. Further, a follower's personal belief system will influence his/her decision to trust a leader. In other words, the more a follower believes, thinks and acts like a leader, the more they are likely to trust him or her.

In previous blogs, I've discussed the effects of our past experiences and heart wounds on our behavior and on our integrity. In the same way our personal behavior and integrity have been shaped by our past experiences, so is our evaluation of a leader's character. For example, if we have strong administrative abilities, we usually like and trust a leader that is administratively strong. If we like to be merciful and gracious to others, we like a leader that is the same. If we believe that most people are honest and good, then we'll likely trust a leader based on what he or she says. If our life experiences make it difficult to trust, we'll usually look beyond the leader's words before we extend our trust. And so on.

From recent political history we can see some cases on point. After the sexual indiscretions of a U.S. president were made public, many people commented that these events didn't affect his ability to run our country. Numerous politicians have been found guilty of violations of law, lately the tax law, and still appointed or elected to their offices without any public outcry. An eloquent public speaker such as our current president seems to be trusted based on his words, even though the many of the laws and actions being enacted have been tried and failed in this country and others. Some believe many people trust and follow a leader based on his promises in the hope they will be true. This brings us back to the opening words by Miles Monroe expressed this way, effective leadership is the perfect balance of competence, vision and virtue.

Retiring after several terms served, a U.S. senator stated that he could no longer be part of a system that required compromise of one's integrity and values to succeed. On the other hand, some people believe that some influence of a person's character (a senator in this case), even if compromised by the system of government, is better than no influence in their absence.

What do you think? Does a person's character, their integrity and honesty, influence their work and personal lives? What do you believe? What is the foundation of your belief system?

WHERE HAS INTEGRITY GONE?

2009-04-10T10:47:00.002-06:00

Since the word integrity seems to have gone the way of relativism, here is an early definition from Webster’s American Dictionary of the English Language, 1828 Edition:

"Integrity: The entire unimpaired state of anything, particularly of the mind; moral soundness or purity; incorruptness; uprightness; honesty. Integrity comprehends the whole moral character, but has a special reference to uprightness in mutual dealings, transfers of property, and agencies for others."

Cough! Choke! Where has integrity gone? Is it in corporate management? How about politicians? Is it a characteristic of the church? Do we see it in our current president? Do his appointees have it? Do you and I have integrity? When asked if they have high integrity, most people will answer "yes." On the other hand when asked if one's integrity affects their ability to do a job or hold an office, the answer is "no." The real question is, "does integrity really matter anymore?"

Here is a brief list of "polling" questions to get your input. Be honest, please!

1. Have highly publicized corporate frauds ever created justification for our cheating "just a little bit?" We're thinking about little things like leaving work half an hour early, answering personal emails or phone calls during work hours, or requesting reimbursement for a $50 meal when we only spent $5.

2. Does the apparent fact that many politicians don't pay all their income taxes, take contributions in return for favors, or blame others for problems they've created cause us to consider doing the same?

3. Do the publicized actions of fallen religious leaders affect our faith and personal integrity?

Let me know what you think about these issues and I'll discuss your comments in a future blog.

THE BEHAVIOR OF MAN

2009-03-26T15:58:00.004-06:00

Our life experiences both good and bad, along with the influence of one’s culture and genetic makeup, result in behavioral patterns that can be identified by several different personality inventory systems. One such system, called the Personal Profile System by Dr. John Geier, often referred to as the DISC model of behavior, is widely used to assess the strengths and weaknesses in one’s behavior. The book, Understanding How Others Misunderstand You, by Ken Voges & Ron Braund discusses the four behavioral styles:

D ominant & Decisive--Goal: Authority and Action
I nfluencing & Interactive--Goal: Persuasion & Popularity
S teadiness & Supportive--Goal: Cooperation & Caring
C ompliant & Cautious--Goal: Conscientious & Consistent

While every person may possess some of each of these styles, a person tends to function in the style that is most comfortable, especially when under stress. A person’s style is neither good nor bad and can be a strength or a weakness depending on how and when it is applied. Because our behavior is mostly learned, most of it can be changed. As one matures and his or her character is developed, the person’s predominant style may be altered. Unless there is conscious effort made to change, however, most people subconsciously default to their “comfort-zone” style.

So, what does all this have to do with ethics? Simply, a code of ethics or conduct is behavior that begins with what one believes in their heart. A harden criminal, for example, could not be influenced by a written code of conduct. On the other hand, a person with a “live and let live” philosophy could not be expected to report an ethics violator. Our behavioral style influences our personal ethics, i.e., “who we are.” Understanding our behaviors helps us understand others. Understanding the behavior and ethics of co-workers, business contacts and friends can empower us to chose relationships carefully and can have direct effects on our future and success.

THE DRIVING FORCE OF MANKIND

2009-03-24T20:23:00.004-06:00

The driving force of mankind underpinning all issues of ethics is a person's heart motives. Scientific research of our heart’s influence on our lives was published by Doc Childre and Howard Martin in a book called The Heartmath Solution by HarperCollins in 2000. An excerpt from page 4 reads:

“Over the past twenty years, scientists have discovered new information about the heart that makes us realize it’s far more complex than we’d every imagined. We now have scientific evidence that the heart sends us emotional and intuitive signals to help govern our lives. Instead of simply pumping blood, it directs and aligns many systems in the body so that they can function in harmony with one another. And although the heart is in constant communication with the brain, we know that it makes many of its own decisions.

Because of this new evidence, we have to rethink our entire attitude toward ‘following our hearts.’ At the Institute of HeartMath (IHM), scientists have found that the heart is capable of giving us messages and helping us far more than anyone ever suspected. Throughout this book, we’ll share the research that provides new evidence of the power of heart intelligence. And we’ll show how that intelligence can have a measurable impact on our decision-making, our health problems, our productivity at work, our children’s learning ability, our families, and the overall quality of our lives.”

Someone once said, “A man is like a tube of toothpaste. When he’s squeezed, what’s on the inside of him comes out!” Psychologists have long said that the hurts and wounds from one’s early childhood, even while in the womb, can determine and influence behavior throughout one’s life. The New Testament of the Bible contains verses like, “Out of the abundance of the heart a man speaks” and “As a man thinks in his heart, so is he.”

In the book, The HeartMath Solution, scientists have proven that one’s “heart code” determines their behavior and influences the environment around them. Maybe it can be said this way: Whatever we believe in our hearts will guide our lives and influence our ethics. So, for example, if one thinks all blue collar workers are immature, have no common sense or need constant supervision, all blue collar workers working for that person will be treated in ways that support those beliefs. Worse yet, blue collar workers treated in line with these beliefs are likely to produce behaviors that demonstrate immaturity, lack of common sense and the need for close supervision.

A CPA once shared a story about one of his new clients. When she asked the CPA to prepare her tax return, the new client said that she had not had “good luck” with CPAs. She related that they had all made mistakes on her tax returns that cost her “lots of money.” When the CPA completed the return and presented it to his client, the client found several significant errors! In one instance, the CPA had put his personal social security number in the space provided for the client’s social security number! The beliefs in our hearts can influence both our actions and those of others.

A person’s ethical behaviors are often learned or inherited. Most importantly, they can result from character growth and development. One’s personal ethical responsibility is to make daily decisions based on pure heart motives, i.e., to do the right thing, at the right time and in the right way. Understanding one's heart motives is the beginning of applying ethics for success!

WHERE DO WE GET OUR PERSONAL ETHICS?

2009-03-12T15:38:00.005-06:00

How many grains of sand are there on a seashore? Obviously, more than any of us can count. There are probably the same number of influences on our personal ethics. Here are a few significant influences I can think of:

Our parents and family
The community in which we live
The state or country in which we live
The time period to which we were born
Societal values and mores
Political figures
Sports heroes
Religion
Career
TV and movie stars
Spouse, children and grandchildren
Peers
Life experiences

It is likely you can think of many others. Readers of this blog would like to hear your story. Tell me about what or who you believe has had the most signifcant influence on your personal ethics, either good or bad. I'll group your responses into areas and share some of your stories in this blog (anonymously of course).

I'll get the ball rolling. I grew up in a small midwestern town in the 1940s. The county seat of a farming community, long hours of hard work, honesty and integrity typified the values of most residents. Entertainment was a 5 cent movie on Saturday (for us kids) and sitting in my Dad's 49 Mercury on main street watching people on Saturday night. Family activities included fishing trips, camping in our RV (a built-out school bus), and occasional meals with aunts, uncles and cousins. My mother and father didn't go to church with any regularity but a pastor from our neighborhood took me to church most Sundays. So, my town, my friends and family and the era in which I grew up gave me a desire to live my life with integrity.

My father owned and operated a real "service station," practically 24 hours a day since he was the only store in town. In fact, the pressure of years of work lead him to an emotional collapse and, finally, death from a heart attack when I was 14. My mother was pretty strong willed and, forgive me Mom, pretty controlling. While I believe she loved me and her intentions were good, she raised me as her father had raised her which was not always so good. The lack of affection from my parents left me feeling that somehow I wasn't good enough, even that I was a "bad boy." My compensation in life, then, was to defeat any person or obstacle in my way...sometimes even if that meant unethical behavior (refer to my initial blog "What Are Ethics").

Then came the darkness of an experience that I know many children have shared, sexual molestation. In my case, the perpetrator was a middle aged woman. Not having conscious recognition of the experieince until mid-life, I realize these years shaped my thinking, my behavior and certainly my personal ethics.

Many behaviorists agree that our experiences during the first 5 or 6 years of our lives become the pattern for the rest of our lives. The influence of these experiences affects what we think others think about us, how we behave, and even whether we succeed or fail in our lives. Here is a key: these memories are indelibly impressed on our minds and our hearts. Next time we'll discuss some of the scientific discoveries about the memory capability of our hearts. Join me won't you?

WHAT ARE ETHICS?

2009-03-10T13:57:00.010-06:00

While the common understanding of ethics seems to change day-to-day, a definition would make a good starting place for this blog. Here are some definitions of ethics and integrity from Webster’s American Dictionary of the English Language, 1828 Edition:

Ø Ethics: 1. The doctrines of morality or social manners; the science of moral philosophy, which teaches men their duty and reasons for it. 2. A system of moral principles; a system of rules for regulating the actions and manners of men in society.

Ø Integrity: The entire unimpaired state of anything, particularly of the mind; moral soundness or purity; incorruptness; uprightness; honesty. Integrity comprehends the whole moral character, but has a special reference to uprightness in mutual dealings, transfers of property, and agencies for others.

A logical question should be: "In 2009, what is the standard or model for ethical behavior in the United States?" Is it religion, government, corporate america, ethnic and cultural backgrounds, values of our friends, particular situations, or what each of us considers right? Maybe a better question would be: "Is there any ethical standard or model at all?"

I author and teach seminars for a major publisher of practice aids and seminars. Presenting accounting and auditing subjects for CPAs, I spend some of my time teaching professional business ethics. As you may know, CPAs are required to comply with a Code of Professional Conduct published by the American Institute of Certified Public Accountants. Parameters for behavior are well defined by this Code, yet each year thousands of violations are brought before state and national governing bodies, many of which result in severe sanctions. Just because we have defined behavior doesn't mean we act accordingly!

The Sarbanes Oxley Act requires publically-held companies to establish, post and maintain codes of conduct for employees. Does the creation of these codes of conduct ensure compliant behavior? The daily news testifies, obviously not!

The system of government in the United States was founded on Judeo-Christian Biblical principles. If we know nothing more than the golden rule, "Do unto others and you would have them do unto you," how well do you think we are doing?

In the weeks and months ahead, this blog will delve into the issues of ethics, where we've come from, what has created change, what we're experiencing in our nation today, where our nation is going and how ethics and integrity affect our daily lives. Please join me on this journey; I welcome your comments!